


sayang

by heolaman



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Angst, Fluff, Humor, Implied/Referenced Abuse, M/M, Reincarnation, Size Difference, Slow Burn, Soft soft soft baekhyunnie, age-gap, inaccurate sciences, mention of MPREG, mention of non-con
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-01
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-05-31 15:11:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 25,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19428538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heolaman/pseuds/heolaman
Summary: even without words, chanyeol learned how to love and be loved by the boy who survived hundreds of years being trapped in ice.





	1. <s a t u >

**Author's Note:**

> hello! this is supposed to be my entry for #BAE2019 but I wasnt able to finish on time! i really loved the prompt! to the prompter, i'm sorry if this is a little bit late but here you go! i hope you'll like it.
> 
> will update one chapter every week as per suggested of my beta @baekyeolkr! 
> 
> [this is prompt 203 from BAE2019!]

Chanyeol’s hands itch to grip on something firmly to release his annoyance as he waits for the brewer to finish a pitcher of coffee in their lab’s spotless and quiet pantry. He dislikes anything that can actually make him stay awake but right now, he has to force himself to take it.

He’s not usually _this_ grumpy and he definitely isn't an aggressive type of person but strangling someone, specifically Sehun, is subduing the irritation he’s feeling.

He glances at his watch and clicked on his tongue after being reminded of how late Sehun is for his shift.

_Three hours._

Three whole hours he could’ve used to rest at home after pulling an all-nighter. His bed… he longs to feel the soft sheets of his comforter and sleep. For sure, Yoora, being the caring older sister she is, did his laundry already. Slipping in his newly washed beddings is what he very much wanted. 

_Not another cup of coffee or another hour of extending his shift._

If there’s one out of a long list of things the senior archaeologist hated – wasted time because of other people’s tardiness tops the list.

Scratch that - Sehun probably tops the list for the day. Just by thinking about the younger makes the man desire to pull his hair so badly but he can't - tying his neck-length hair is troublesome. 

He and Sehun doesn't have a bad relationship. Dealing with Sehun is almost like dealing with a younger sibling who does things way oppositely to others. The younger was a good kid after all, a little clumsy and a headache but efficient on doing his job. 

However, his recent tardiness is a major issue and his personality and well, unwanted aegyeo is not enough to cover it. This is the third instance that Chanyeol had his personal commitments and plans compromised because of someone else’s fault and this all happened in a week. The last time Sehun came late, Chanyeol wasn’t able to join the dinner his fiance’s parents arranged. 

Chanyeol definitely doesn't want his fiance to be upset again.

Imagine being tired from work then getting an earful of nagging from Yuki. He was half asleep the whole time and had to exert more energy to make up with his mad fiance by wooing him. He's not a romantic to be frank but it's the least he could do. He knows how stressful it is to plan for a wedding and Yuki’s doing all of the it by himself because of the nature of his work. 

The pressure is on, especially when your boss is your own father. The professor is known to be meticulous, stubborn, and greedy for discoveries. He doesn't stop on asking questions and answering them. His penchant for new information makes people assume that he’s mad, making them keep a good distance away from him.

Well, he is kind of intimidating with all the Einstein hair he has. Professor Park is an odd fellow, Chanyeol won’t deny it. But it’s the harmless type of madness. Professor Park is still human with a proper functioning brain. He will never hurt someone else or do something inhumane. No. He’s just bad at being with people, that’s all.

Working for Professor Park is a privilege and a sentence at the same time. He is one of the greatest discoverers of their time, written lots of books about his fields of expertise — a doctor and an archaeologist who spent half of his life excavating and discovering aids to mankind and knew information about the different lives that existed before them. Therefore, their works and studies should be at par with his. 

Chanyeol looks up to him. He had to be in deep waters just to be able to work under him and he liked where he is right now. It’s a good paying job plus he gets to spend time and check on him. 

It's cool that Professor Park studied a lot and the government trusts him with highly confidential studies, just like their current subject for the past three months. All of these were the only things he knew about his own father. They're not that close, just casual; like how subordinates and bosses interact with one another. 

It can't be helped if your dad is more fascinated with his work than his family.

His thoughts were interrupted when the brewer stops, an indication that his coffee is done. After pouring a good amount in his huge mug, the archaeologist took a seat around one of the many tables in the room, facing the flat screen TV mounted on the wall. He frowned upon seeing it play a cringey chick flick he would never waste time on unless Yuki forces him to. 

He looks around and searched for the remote so he can change the channel that wouldn't waste his short coffee break. However, he remembers his troublesome assistant is known to misplace a lot of valuable items in the facility. The remote is nowhere to be found.

It takes a lot of patience to deal with Sehun and it made Chanyeol pull his curly hair out of frustration. Being irritated produces a chain reaction of utter annoyance and bad luck. Everything he sees pisses him off. 

Now, the chick flick and the remote is forgotten. Chanyeol’s attention is pinned on his naturally permed locks and how unmanageable it is. He could have had a nice jet black hair like Sehun. Yoora has tameable hair like that of their deceased mother but his father’s genes has to be dominant and voila— he gets the silly hair.

And out of all the time his elastic would snap, it’s when he doesn’t have an extra. 

Now his hair is all over his face. 

He inwardly curses. His nape also hurts from the snap.

“Sehun you’re really dead -” he grumbles to himself as he took a sip on his mug, only to spit the dark liquid back unmannerly. The coffee is still hot and lacked the sweetness to balance the bitterness but the ugly taste definitely stirred him up awake. 

Chanyeol waits for his coffee to cool down, and by the time Chanyeol looked at the digital clock on the wall, he is reminded of the end of his coffee break. He realizes that there’s no chance of having his coffee to cool down while he’s at the pantry, so decides to just take it back inside the lab. It’s time for the scheduled diagnosis and it’s something he likes and dislikes doing. He can’t choose.

The laboratory is a level down the pantry. It’s built underground the Park’s manor located in the heart of the Capitol. It has up to date technology and incomparable security. The lab was the previous Governor’s gift to his father for his brilliant contributions way back years ago when he’s still a child who knew more, nothing less. They even gave the name AXIS to the facility and recognized it as part of the Government. The funding comes from them, too. 

Before Chanyeol could get inside, he has to undergo a series of security checks. He has to punch in his ID badge, get his body scanned and verified by the censors, plus type in the passcode before the heavy metal steel door opens for him. 

It’s too much, but it can't be helped because it’s protocol.

The interior of the lab can probably be seen in other research facilities - it’s white, and filled with machines. The work stations are on the left side. They only occupy two tables and Chanyeol doesn't want to spare it a look. The mess on Sehun’s table stresses him a lot. 

The facility they have at the manor was rather smaller than that of the AXIS but for three people manning it, it’s quite spacious enough. 

[Welcome back, Doctor Park.]

The AI greets and it gave Chanyeol a little breather for being annoyed at everything he sees. This is one of the nice features of the facility and the residence upstairs. Everything is managed by _Alis._ That’s what Sehun calls her, saying that it’s pretty boring to not give the artificial intelligence system a persona. 

Chanyeol argued once, saying that it’s just a system and he watched too much of MCU. That sparked a childish banter with the younger, who argued that he disagrees with the idea because Chanyeol never watched a single movie ever.

 _“Is watching and knowing the MCU a prerequisite in life? Is it a crime that I’m not interested in it?”_ Chanyeol defended himself then and Sehun returned his defensiveness with a playful grin

_“No, sunbae. It just means that you’re an old man trapped in a thirty year old’s body! Are you aware of it?”_

Chanyeol just scrunched his nose. It’s a sign of defeat. 

“ _Come on sunbae! She’s part of the team! She’s the mom here”_ the younger mused, still not giving up on the proposition to change Alis’ voice. Sehun insisted that they need a little lovely and maternal personality around to provide the warmth feeling of home in the little facility.

Before Sehun joined the team (he was recommended by the Governor), it was only Alis that Chanyeol talks to - the AI is a multifunctional software program. With it’s highly advanced user interface, it does more of note taking and providing verified and accurate data. It also mans the activities in the lab when no one’s around. Practically, she takes care of everything happening in the lab and everyone in its system. The AI was a great company. The British accent is entertaining too. 

Thus the nickname Alis was born. _A Lovely Intelligent System._

It’s better than naming her after Chanyeol’s exes just like what he initially suggested.

Sehun is silly but his silliness actually lessen the stiffness of the work environment. Gradually, the nickname kind of grew on them. Even his dad calls her Alis. Yoora loved her too because she reminds the professor to take rests and his vitamins whenever he’s cooped up in his study. 

“Hey Alis - any updates from Professor?”

[The Professor left a personal mail for you while you’re out for your break, Doctor Park. Should I flash it for you?]

“No thank you. I’ll read it later.” Chanyeol replied as he sauntered and made his way to the healing chamber at the center of the room, still unbothered with the mail. He used to be antsy with personal mails sent by his father but it’s probably about his upcoming wedding. He’s focused on wearing his gloves to think about it but he has a hint that it’s probably about his absence.

He sent the invitation to him last night so it must be a reply. He’s not looking forward on knowing the content of the letter, really.

“Hey, Alis. Can you remind Sehun to clean his desk later when he comes in for his shift?”

[I’ve been reminding him about it, Doctor Park, but it seems that watching _Ippeuni_ is taking a lot of his time.]

It was a response already expected by the tall scientist. Of course, Sehun would be too occupied watching _Ippeuni_ to care about cleaning his messy work station. “Send him a mail for me, then. Subject; Tardiness. Message; if you won’t be around in ten minutes you’ll work upstairs and entry badge will be revoked.”

[A warning letter?]

“You think it’s enough to scare him?”

[Not letting him see Ippeuni would be a good threat, Doctor Park.]

“I thought so, too.” he replied, slightly smiling after putting a mask on his face. He liked rattling Sehun only because he’s fun to tease. 

Chanyeol walked closely to the healing pod and looked at the sleeping figure inside it. “Are you moderating the temperature inside the pod, Alis?”

[Yes Doctor Park. I’ve reduced the temperature inside as scheduled.] 

“Any signs of negative reaction?” he asked, and a hologram of reports were flashed on either side of his head. So far, _Ippeuni_ is adjusting well to the sudden change of temperature despite being in a coma. _That’s good._

He closes the hologram tab and proceeded on opening the pod, revealing a boy clad in blue hospital gown. 

Chanyeol often finds himself mesmerized with the boy. Sehun gave the nickname Ippeuni for a reason because indeed, he is breathtakingly _beautiful_. Something about how he looked was majestic. Ippeuni has a face of a deity seen in books. His soft features matched well with his natural grey hair. For a person that belongs in a tribe, his porcelain skin is hard to believe. It makes Chanyeol think he’s part of the royalty in their tribe’s caste system. Sehun told him before that he was so flawless, it’s practically glowing as if it was sprinkled with pixie dust. 

It might be an exaggeration but Ippeuni was radiant.

Ippeuni’s mere existence was something that can’t be explained by science. They could only conclude his origin based on the tattoos he has on his back and his clothing and accessories. The empirical evidences they’ve gathered were not enough to explain how a frail and delicate looking boy, who’s two heads shorter than him, managed to be alive and breathing after being frozen for estimatedly a thousand years, under the sea. 

It’s unbelievable. Science doesn't have theories to explain his survival at the moment. Who would’ve thought they’re stuck on getting answers with the bizarre being unconscious inside the healing pod? 

It’s unacceptable for AXIS to not have an answer. There always should be an answer. However, the initial priority of getting answers suddenly changed to keeping _Ippeuni_ alive.

His father wants Ippeuni to regain consciousness.

Six months ago, the Governor summoned him in the White House. It was an emergency call and despite having dinner together with Yuki’s family, he had to cut it short and leave. 

Governor Jung handed over AXIS a huge block of ice they found hidden under the sea of Jeju Island with a frail looking boy inside. It was horrifying, even Chanyeol got the chills when he first saw it in the lab. Yet, Ippeuni had a pitiful position. He’s like protecting himself, struggling to find air to breath. There’s a big urge for Chanyeol to thaw him right then and there to put him in a comfortable position but Alis detected a heartbeat. 

A faint but steady heartbeat. 

It was life.  
The boy was alive.

Chanyeol may have forgotten how his father looked when there’s a different expression on his face because he’s so used on his stoic facade but when when Alis scanned Ippeuni for the second time around and confirmed the faint heartbeat was still going, there was a fatherly smile on the older’s face that he unconsciously longed for. 

Chanyeol knew by then, that his father wanted to save Ippeuni no matter what happens. 

The thawing process didn't take long. Fortunately, he doesn't have any organ injuries and his brain is still sending signals to Alis’ but Ippeuni had to be placed in an ice filled tub for a month to let his body adjust to normal temperature little by little. Sleepless nights started there because Ippeuni’s blood pressure would instantly drop. The lab would be in panic, so desperate to save him. There were a lot of times they had to revive him and Professor Park is so glad that their subject is a fighter. 

After a month, the Government gave AXIS a healing pod with the latest technology Ippeuni needed. His brain and heart activity as well as the temperature he needs were thoroughly monitored and Alis’ system was integrated in it, making work easier for them to check and give what he needs. 

[Doctor Park, a response from Doctor Oh came in. He said with a crying emoji: Please don’t.] 

Chanyeol chuckles. Sehun really loves being with Ippeuni. “He better come right now, then.” He proceeds on checking the boy.

He started with opening one eye then another with his pen light to check if there’s any movement or reaction. Ippeuni has heterochromia. His right eye is hazel brown while his left is snowy white. “Come on, one movement is enough.” Chanyeol mumbled to himself, desperate for a little reaction but no matter how many times he swinged his penlight, there was none. He sighed. It was disappointing to not have any result other than the score of 1 or Not Testable - this kind of results have been going on for months now.

[Are you tired, Doctor Park?]

Chanyeol isn’t. His sleepiness was sorted by his coffee earlier and his body is so used with the job they have in AXIS. Alis must’ve perceived his heavy sigh is due to dissatisfaction. “I’m good. Thanks for asking. Please record this on his GCS sheet Alis. Eye response 1.” the archaeologist glances at Ippeuni’s small hand and held it carefully. It was always invitingly warm and soft. He thought of giving him a painful stimulus by pinching a finger so hard despite of the hundred percent chance that it's not effective.

If Ippeuni responds to it then it’s a big progress.

_Damn it. He's hoping._

Chanyeol really wanted Ippeuni to at least have a little improvement.

He's already expecting nothing but still, it's disheartening to get nothing. 

_Again._

“Verbal response, 1. Motor response, 1.”

[Noted, Doctor Park.]

“Continue to adjust the temperature for him.”

Just as when he’s about to close the healing pod to continue his research on his station, he hears the censors doing identification process. His mind drifts away from from glooming over the results of Ippeuni’s tests. He expected to see Sehun when the metal door granted him access but he’s not expecting the younger to look as if he was chased by dogs on his way. 

“Safe!” Sehun exclaims, grinning triumphantly as he wiped the sweat on his forehead and went inside. Chanyeol laughs at his usual silliness and noticed how disoriented the younger looked. “Is this the second coming? Jesus why are you here?”

Chanyeol scoffs. The nerve of the younger to tease him because of his laid down wavy hair and do a praying position when he made him extend shift. “Don’t start. My elastic snapped and it’s my last one. Don’t start, Oh Sehun.” he warns with the tone of a real older brother in his voice and Sehun playfully laughs at him. 

“I told you, buy a scrunchie or something instead of the elastic. It contributes to the trash problem of the world, sunbae!” Sehun starts on talking endlessly and Chanyeol somehow got used to it. He drops the paperbag he’s holding on his desk as well as the folders he held in his armpits carefully. 

The paperbag intrigues Chanyeol a little bit and hasd his eyes on it for a moment. The older then figures out that it must be desserts since the sweetness of vanilla, milk and strawberry quickly fills the lab. 

“Sunbae! How can you and Alis scare me like that!!” Sehun whines as he arranges his thick glasses and wore his lab coat “That’s unfair.”

“It’s a warning, Sehun.” Chanyeol replies impassively, finally closing the pod. “Tell me, why are you late this time?”

Sehun inhales deeply before breathing out an exasperated sigh. “My niece! I had to take care of my niece. My sister left her in my care for awhile since it’s hectic in the White House and she can’t look after her.” he sighed once more and starts wearing his face mask. “Bold of her to assume that I can take care of the child, right? I don’t even bother to make my bed! Anyways, I had to wait for the nanny to fill in but she’s late! I swear, I didn't mean to be late, sunbae! you know I love being here.” 

“Look. I understand the situation but you’re in but you have to figure out a solution for that.” Chanyeol looks at Ippeuni before leaving him again. There’s always this heavy feeling whenever the check ups finish. Chanyeol feels bad to see the boy confined in the small chamber. It’s like Ippeuni doesn't want to be alone. “You’re late for three hours, man. I need to sleep, too.” 

“Does that mean the warning gets dismissed?” Sehun muses because he felt the kindness of the older. Chanyeol’s not annoyed anymore because gloom took over him. “Come on, hyung. I’ll give you the cake?”

“Don’t bribe me.” The senior archaeologist crossed his arms and frowned at the younger. “I don’t eat sweets. And hey! You’re already late! How come you still had time to buy that?” 

“I didn't! There’s a newly opened bakeshop nearby! He’s giving free samples of his treats.” Sehun looked happy while glancing at the paperbag. “Jongdae’s nice and cute. He’s like Pikachu.” 

_Jongdae?_ He’s probably the new guy with the bakeshop Sehun met. “Look. If you want to compliment someone you’re interested in, it’s rude to compare them with a pokemon. You’ll get hit if you do.”

“W-what? _In-in-interested???_ Who even told you that? I just met him today! How can I like him? No! I don’t!” the younger stammers, face reddening all of a sudden. “I only like Ippeuni!”

“Clearly, you like Ippeuni _differently_ from Jongdae.” he teases though he looked so impassive and Sehun defensively denies it right off the bat, saying it’s a stupid assumption. 

Chanyeol took a seat on the swivelling chair near his station and grabbed one the folders Sehun brought in. The coffee he had would probably make him stay awake so he decides take a few of it home to study.

“Your shift is done, sunbae. Why are you still here?” Sehun asks curiously. “Please go home or you might take your anger out on me.”

“If I’m angry, your access already got revoked and you’re not allowed here. I have some time to spare so let’s talk about this new crush of yours.” The older watches Sehun panic with what he said as he got confused which hologram tab he should check first. Alis even had to help him because he’s making a fool of himself. He _definitely_ like the new person in the block. “Have you asked for his number -”

“Why would I ask for his number! Sunbae! Can you let me work in peace?”

“I don’t think so. You were late for three hours. This is a well deserved payback.”

Sehun groans. He’s not tolerant when he’s the center of teasing yet Chanyeol enjoyed attacking him with the new found weakness. The younger only escapes him when he walked towards the healing pod and plasters his face on the glass to look closely at Ippeuni like he usually does. “Hello Ippeuni. I’m here again.” he greeted gently like he’s talking to a child. “Can you give us a response today? Your vital signs are good and you’re doing so well for the past month. Don’t worry, it’s okay if you still can’t. We’ll wait… but it would be nice… if you would just… you know what? I think Doctor Park would be delighted if you respond to us… he’s a little grumpy, you see.”

“Who’s fault is it, anyway.” 

The younger gives him and unaffected shrug and then went back on admiring the sleeping boy.

Chanyeol admires how nice and patient Sehun is the the unconscious boy. The younger spends his shift talking nonstop Ippeuni even if he doesn’t respond to him. The younger firmly believes that it can favorably affect the recovery process. It might not be sure up to what extent but still, the younger got nothing to lose if he does right? He’s a natural talker too unlike Chanyeol who most of the time keeps his mouth shut. Sehun goes on telling Ippeuni his day. Sometimes, he includes him and Alis in the conversation, too.

“You’re so beautiful, Ippeuni.” Sehun sighs dreamily. Chanyeol thinks so too, but he never said it out loud. “I can’t wait for you to open those eyes and recover properly. I’ll buy you cake. Do you like cakes? Wait - do cakes exist in your time? Probably not. But it’s okay. I’ll buy lots for you.” then the room fell into silence. “Sunbae, ever wondered how his voice sounds like? Or his behavior when he’s conscious?”

Chanyeol thinks he never thought about it because he was so fixated on studying Ippeuni’s origin and getting responses from him to bother for the past six months. But he bets his voice is soft and music to one’s ears unlike his who’s too low, it often comes off scary. 

The thought of Ippeuni waking up makes Chanyeol feel rewarded but then a slight pang in his chest makes it crumble.

If Ippeuni wakes up, there’s a big chance the Government would transfer him to a better rehabilitation facility. Sehun probably knows it as well but tries not to be too wrecked. It’s bound to happen that they won’t be able to see him anyways.

“Don’t lean too much, Sehun.” he tries to take away Sehun’s attention from the gloomy area of reality the younger needs to face for being too attached with Ippeuni. “You might creep Ippeuni out.”

Sehun straightens and forces himself to shake off the blue mood he’s having by smiling. “Yeah, yeah. He might open his eyes today right?” the younger tries to be optimistic. “I’ll try to be less creepy.”

“You do that.” The senior nods, cheering for him. He stood up and took a few folders from the ones that Sehun brought in. “I’ll take this.”

“Sunbae, no.” the younger stops Chanyeol from taking it. “You’re going home now, right? I’ve burdened you for being late already. I’ll study those files and make reports -”

The senior archaeologist chuckles and shakes his head. “I had five cups of coffee. I’ll take a few. It helps me get my sleep easier by reading this data.”

Sehun didn't have any options but to let the older. He’ slightly confused whenever Chanyeol acts way too kind to him but lowkey dismisses it, making the whole thing for his personal benefit only. 

Taking home the files help make his loads lesser. He always does that but he tries not to make it obvious. 

The senior archaeologist has this distant demeanor but he’s been guiding and helping him do his job properly. If Sehun wasn't perceptive, he wouldn't even be that friendly with him, at all. The older would always put a safe line with his relationships before but that doesn't made him insensitive. For Sehun, he’s caring but he definitely loved looking all cool so he’s shy to say things he felt out loud or make his caring way too obvious. “Hyung -” he calls before Chanyeol could leave the lab. It is a slip of the tongue to call him with such familiarity. “Please take a cake.” 

Chanyeol looks inside and stares at him before taking the mango cake. “Have a good shift, Sehun-ah.” He bids before going on his way out the lab. 

The younger knows Chanyeol accepted his gratitude. Cool people like him are hard to read and they preferred less mushiness, less words. “Thanks for not taking the mousse cake. hyung.” he mumbles to himself.

[Would you like me to send that as an email, Doctor Oh?] 

Alis interrupted his moment. “Hell, no. He’d kill me.” _for being cute and mushy._

[Should I pull out articles and laws about murder, Doctor Oh?]

“Alis, when did you start talking a lot?!”

[Since you started doing the same, Dr. Oh.]

*****

Chanyeol is disoriented as he enters the Michelin restaurant Yuki booked to meet their wedding planner. Everything’s all set and Yuki wants Chanyeol to have a say on his choices for their upcoming wedding.

It was his day-off yesterday but he was so engrossed with the files Sehun gave him to read. He doesn't usually oversleep but it’s the start of winter already. The weather makes him lethargic and sickly.

Yet, of all the days he had to oversleep and feel feverish, it has to be the day when he promised his fiance that he’ll make up to him for all the shortcomings he had all throughout the six months he’s busy about Ippeuni. If it wasn’t snowing outside, he’ll take his motorbike on full speed just to cut Yuki’s waiting short.

But he’s an hour and a half late - even if he makes his motorbike rush above the permitted speed and earn a ticket for it, point is, he still made Yuki wait. Not making it on time shows how bad he is on keeping promises.

“Mr. Park.” the usher greets him. They frequent the place so it’s no surprise that the older man clad in stylish suit knows him. “Would you like a towel?”

Chanyeol declines, quickly removing his wet leather jacket. “Could you dry this for me instead?”

“Of course Mr. Park, let me escort you to your reservation first.” 

Chanyeol carefully trails behind the usher, feeling so small and embarrassed for nothing. There was never a time that he felt comfortable inside a high class, exclusive restaurant. He’s an outcast, that’s what he feels as they walk through the quiet hall, lighted with yellowish lights. Somehow, the lighting of the place made his eyes tear up. He resists the urge to rub his eyes and relieve himself with the itching but his eyes were sensitive. 

It is quiet and Chanyeol tries to pin his attention to something else instead of the weird stares he’s been getting from the other customers. He’s so bad dealing with stares, yet he had to swallow it and put on an unbothered face. 

He subtly checks himself on the mirrors they pass by and concludes that he’s definitely an outcast with his attire. He has no sense of the latest smart casual fashion and settled with plain beige sweater and jeans finished by comfortable trainer sneakers. His hair was firmly tied into a bun at the back of his head with an elastic he found under his bed and gasped inwardly, remembering how Yuki asked him to cut his hair short already.

Yet there he is, still looking like Jesus with huge ears and hairless face. He’s so busy in the lab he couldn't find the time to pay a visit to a salon. 

Not dreading anymore at the moment, he lets the usher lead him to a secluded room. He wasn't expecting Yuki to welcome him with a big smile on his face upon showing up late. It’s natural reaction to receive a frown from his lovely fiance but since there are other people inside the room who’s backs were facing on him, Yuki tried to stop himself. 

Chanyeol knows he’s everything his pissed fiance doesn't like to see . Late, long hair, grandpa attire - it’s everything Yuki has been dying to change about him, yet he can’t bring himself to follow it.

He walks around the table and leans down to give Yuki a kiss on the cheek, partly tasting the powder he probably used on his face. He can't help but notice how pretty he looks - his blond hair is messily styled and he’s wearing his usual designer clothing. For today, he matched the beige pants hugging his slim legs with denim shirt topped with a wool coat he remembered buying when they had vacation in Paris. “Sorry. I’m late -”

“Later.” Yuki sighs, cutting him off and giving him a small smile instead. He probably doesn't want to deal with him since there are other people in the room and Chanyeol was grateful. He can appreciate and admire his doll like face.

Yuki pats the chair beside him, opting Chanyeol to take a seat. “This is my fiance, Chanyeol, by the way.” he introduces, talking to the other two people in front of them.

“I apologize for being late.” he tells them but the two other people answers him that it’s not a big deal.

In front of him is a woman who looks so elegant and a man who reminded Chanyeol of Pikachu - and it’s not being rude. Pokemons are cute, he thinks.

His compliments are being influenced by Sehun and he feels partly alarmed.

“This is Miss Ahn. Our wedding planner.” Yuki continuesd making the introductions. The woman reachesd for a handshake which Chanyeol tensedly and politely took. “and this is Mr. Kim. He’s the one who'll make our cake.”

“Hi. It’s nice to meet you. You can call me Jongdae. No need to be too formal.” 

Chanyeol reaches for a handshake. Chanyeol scrunches his brows. Jongdae sounds familiar to him. “I’m sorry, this may be weird but have we met before?”

He felt Yuki hold his hand after breaking the handshake with Jongdae. It’s the former’s habit to intertwine their hands wherever they are together. The tightening of the hold is another thing - Yuki’s quick to get jealous. 

Jongdae chuckles softly,. taking his seat. “I’m afraid no. This is actually the first time I met you, Chanyeol-ssi. Though, I hear that comment a lot. I guess my face is just common.” 

Chanyeol was about to reply but Yuki possessively clung on his arm. It is a signal that the smaller is disagreeing with how he’s getting all friendly. So Chanyeol gives a curt nod as a reply.

The conversation ends there. 

“Look babe. We’re done talking about the flowers in the venue while you’re not around.” Yuki starts showing a few samples pictures of flower motif. “I like the mix of navy, white and peach roses. It matches our suits. What do you think?”

Chanyeol awkwardly scratches the back of his head. All the flower motifs shown in front of him looks like the same so he felt like his opinion won't be helpful. “I - I like it too, baby.”

“I knew you’d say that.” Yuki exclaims, satisfied. He gives Chanyeol a kiss on the cheek and the taller felt that it’s safe to hold him by the waist closely. Yuki’s adorable and pretty and Chanyeol’s just head over heels with him. If there are no other people in the room, he’d most likely spend a good time looking at his small fiance talk about everything he likes for their wedding. 

It’s rare to see him so excited like that nowadays. Chanyeol can’t even remember when was the last time they’ve been lovey dovey after his proposal to him. He missed a lot for the past six months because of being engrossed with Ippeuni’s case.

Yuki continued showing him every detail he and the wedding planner agreed on. To be fair, Yuki has an eye towards anything elegant and beautiful. He graduated with a degree in interior design in one of the best university in Paris that’s why he trusts his choices. Chanyeol carefully listened. Yuki chose the Cathedral church in the Capitol. They said, if your wedding happened there, the marriage will last a lifetime and be in full bliss.

Something Chanyeol wanted after witnessing his parents got divorced.

The reception will be held in a five star hotel in Gangnam. Yuki’s fond of the ambiance of luxury hotels. Chanyeol can never understand why, though. Whenever he gets a vacation, his fiance would always insist staying in nice luxury hotels unlike him who doesn't really mind whether it’s just a tourist inn as long as he’s with Yuki. 

Nevertheless, Chanyeol’s supportive with Yuki’s decisions. Ever since they were kids, Yuki was very vocal on having a grand wedding. It’s his dream and Chanyeol’s more than willing to make it happen. Every penny he’s spending for their wedding is worth it if it will make Yuki happy. 

It’s what he deserves. 

The meeting went on until their food was served. Yuki took the liberty of ordering for him and he’s quite unsure if he can finish the steak he got. 

“So.” Miss Ahn starts a conversation after taking a sip from her wine. “Finally, Chanyeol-ssi was able to join us today. I thought I wouldn’t be able to meet you before your wedding date.”

Yuki pouts with what the planner said. “He’s busy, he rarely have the time to even meet me. I'm glad he was able to make it today but I doubt this will happen again."

Chanyeol wants to apologize but Miss Ahn gazed at him. "Yuki is always upset when we meet. He really wanted to plan with you like any other couple I handle, Chanyeol-ssi."

"I - well.. I’m glad Yuki was patient with me." Chanyeol mumbles, looking down on his plate. His absence is the usual reason of their fights. Yuki doesn't understand the nature of being an AXIS employee no matter how hard he explained but he does feel bad that he's not always around to help him with the planning. It sucks that he can't be with him and be with a job that he really have high regards of so easily. 

Yuki grew up to be slightly spoiled by his parents. His future in-laws have all the capacity to give him the world and Chanyeol can’t comment on how they raised Yuki because for him, his tantrums were not much of a big deal. When things don’t go the way he wants them to be, it immediately makes him snappy, and in a sulky mood. Chanyeol grew to be patient about that trait because he loves Yuki, for who he is. The taller adjusted so well, wooing him when he’s upset. They've been together for almost ten years, been around each other for all their lives, it’s automatic to accept your partner’s shortcomings right? It’s the reason why they ended up together. 

And besides, Yuki doesn’t know about Ippeuni. For sure, if he knew, he’ll be more understanding but as protocol and the Governor’s order, no other soul except them in AXIS should know about Ippeuni. The Governor wanted to keep the discovery confidential because it poses danger to the boy as a lot of facilities would take interest on studying him. Though there were articles about Ippeuni when he was obtained from the sea as few fishermen in Jeju witnessed it, the Government was quick to take care of the news getting out to the public. They made it look like it's just a hoax. A mere old people’s story.

“Chanyeol, Miss Ahn is talking to you.” Yuki whispers, frowning as he grips on his hand resting on the table. Chanyeol was pulled out of his thoughts 

“Sorry. What did you say Miss Ahn?”

“That you are too busy. What was your work again?”

“He’s an archaeologist! He works for AXIS.” Yuki was the one who answered because Chanyeol looks so out of it. “He also has a degree in medicine, what was your specialty again, baby?”

Chanyeol hesitates to answer. He’s about to answer veterinary medicine but Yuki went ahead talking about other things instead.

He took it because of passion and Yuki’s family thought it’s ridiculous to take that degree. Even Yuki thinks he should have chosen a different specialization yet Yoora assured him that he’s doing something he’ll probably enjoy for the rest of his life. He loved animals when they’re kids and it’s been a lifelong dream. He got a scholarship in one of the best school abroad and no ordinary slacking person could attain that. His older sister encouraged him so Chanyeol didn't drop out. 

He studied archaeology because he thought it’s the best way to get close with his father. He learned to love the profession later on and it’s probably because it runs in the family. 

Yuki proudly tells everyone his work, despite hating it because it takes too much time in his daily life. Miss Ahn and Jongdae had their mouths agape, amazed with the information. “My father in law is the head of AXIS, too.” 

“Yuki must have a lot of patience in his body then.” Jongdae spoke, after stuffing his mouth with the prime beef he’s eating. “I heard AXIS is regularly immersed with papy works and experiments since they’re affiliated with the Government. Having a husband who dedicates most of their time in research will be a challenge.”

“It is already a challenge.” Yuki laughs. “I can’t even surprise him with sudden apartment visits because he’s always at work. There are times he would ditch me the last minute of our dates. I never had a regular boyfriend. This giant is so inlove with his work more than me.”

“That’s not true.” Chanyeol could only laugh. _I love you more than anything but I’m so bad at showing it._

His fiance was being humorous but it was saddening yet Chanyeol knows he shouldn’t be so sensitive. Everything Yuki said was what he’s unconsciously showing him. He’s an introvert who only knows lab works. Fun is never a word you’d associate with him. He’s not special, far from anyone’s ideals yet the person beside him reciprocate his feelings - even agreeing to marry him.

Even in his deep thought, he noticed that Yuki’s having a hard time, deboning the fish on his plate (he’s on a diet). Chanyeol reached for it and started helping him. In no time, he’s already finished and was surprised to see the two people watching him so fondly. 

“You two really look good together. It’s rare for a wedding planner like me to say this but Yuki really got a good man, right, Jongdae-ssi?”

Jongdae nods. “It makes me envious. I want someone to look at me like how Chanyeol-ssi looks at Yuki-ssi!” 

Chanyeol glances at Yuki but the shorter remained unimpressed. His care is not enough for now, but soon, he’ll make it up to Yuki. 

He looks forward to the new addition in their team next week. With the new guy around, Chanyeol can be a good boyfriend until their wedding day to Yuki. They’ll have a month for their honeymoon - enough time to make up with the months he’s not with his fiance.

“Ah. About the cakes and desserts.” Yuki remembers after finishing his food. “Chanyeol, Jongdae’s shop is near around the manor. Maybe you can come and accompany me this weekend? I mean, it’s just... an hour or two...” 

Chanyeol wipes the corner of his mouth and sees how hopeful Yuki is looking at him. “I have to check my schedule…” there goes the frown of disappointment again, painting Yuki’s doll like face. He still has lots to finish as they welcome the new guy.

Then the feeling of familiarity with Jongdae hits Chanyeol again. “Wait - Jongdae-ssi’s shop is near the manor?” He glances at the smiling man and recalled the day Sehun brought cakes. He’s known to be not a fan of sweets but the mango cake he took home was heavenly. “By any chance, do you remember giving someone free cakes? A tall guy with droopy eyes -”

Jongdae clapped his hands. “Ah! Sehun! Yeah, I know him! He’s a frequent customer,” then the patissier raisesd a brow at him. “Wait, you know him?”

Chanyeol didn't notice that he looked too interested with Jongdae and momentarily forgot Yuki. “I work with him.”

“He’s a funny guy.” Jongdae laughs with his eyes crinkling to crescents. “It never crossed my mind that he works for a big organization like AXIS. He doesn’t usually talk. He just drinks his coffee and eat the cake he orders quietly so I never knew. I thought he’s just a college boy around the neighborhood.”

“He’s young so I can’t blame you for thinking that.” Chanyeol snorts, covering his mouth in the process. He can’t wait to tease Sehun about his frequent visits to Jongdae. 

“You should come with him next time. I’ll give you free cakes.” 

Desserts came in and it’s noticeable for Chanyeol to see Yuki bored as Miss Ahn showed him the design of the giveaways. There’s a building gut feel in him that Yuki’s mad and Chanyeol confirms that gut feel when he tried to take his small hand into his, only to be swatted away coldly. 

_That hurt._

The mood suddenly drops and unfeeling. Maybe it doesn't look like it but Chanyeol’s quickly filled with anxious thoughts that he made Yuki upset again for something he didn't mean to. Despite seating beside each other, Chanyeol can’t help but sense the distance quickly developing between them. He wouldn't mind if it’s a different deal when it’s Yuki.

Soon enough, Miss Ahn finished laying everything to him and Chanyeol was pleased because it definitely is Yuki’s dream wedding. 

And they’re just counting the days for it to happen. Chanyeol looks forward to it, too.

When it’s time to part, Yuki told him that he’s not feeling well and asked him to send them off while he rests for awhile. Before they part ways, Chanyeol expressed how thankful he is for helping Yuki with everything. 

Miss Ahn was the first to leave and Chanyeol was left on the front porch with Jongdae. 

The night was calm, and it looks like the snow hasn't stopped from falling since that afternoon. Chanyeol looks beside him and notices how Jongdae shivered on his place. “Do you have someone to fetch you?” 

“I just booked a ride. My driver is on his way now.” Jongdae smiles, his breath vivid as it slips past his lips. “You okay?”

Chanyeol is frazzled with the question which made Jongdae giggle quietly. 

“Why? Have you never been ask if you’re okay before?” 

The taller shakes his head. “It’s just weird you’ll suddenly ask me that.”

“I notice things most people don't.” Jongdae answers cleverly. “But hey, it’s not a hundred percent accurate but I always follow my gut feel to ask. So if you’re fine, that’s good. If not, then..”

“Then what?”

Jongdae stops and thought deeply. “I’ll give Sehun an extra take out if he visits again to cheer you up.”

“You’re so sure Sehun would visit you again?”

The shorter smiles cheekily. “I’m sure he’ll drop by soon. He says he’s stressed because of a certain Jesus sunbae he has in his work is a pain in a butt, nagging him like crazy.”

“Tell him that’s rude to call a senior a pain the butt when he’s the troublesome one.”

Jongdae grins at him playfully. “You sound pretty offended.”

“Hey.”

The shorter then give Chanyeol a teasing laugh, obviously enjoying to tease him. “Don't worry, he doesn't come around so often in my shop to rant. He likes my coffee and cakes, particularly.”

_He probably likes you too. Chanyeol thought to himself. They exchange friendly smiles, not realizing that the time they spend isn’t awkward._

“Ah. It’s really cold nowadays.” Jongdae exclaims, rubbing his shoulders as he provides warmth by hugging himself. “Aren’t you cold? you can go in now. I can take care of myself from here.”

“Let me at least wait for your cab-”

“Yuki-ssi seems upset awhile ago.” Jongdae points, still with that friendly smile plastered on his face. “You should go back to him.”

Chanyeol gives him a bow before going inside again yet a part of him worries for the patissier. He stops on his tracks when he saw his jacket on the coat rack. Chanyeol took it and rushingly went back to the front porch. His arrival astonishes the shorter male and even more so when he handed his jacket to him.

“Chanyeol-ssi? What is this?” Jongdae’s eyes are pinned on the jacket on his hand. 

“A jacket?”

“I’m perfectly aware it’s a jacket, Chanyeol-ssi!” Jongdae laughs at him. “What for?”

“Well.. you’re cold. You should take it.”

“How about you?”

“It’s okay. I don’t really feel cold or anything.” Chanyeol assures him, scratching the back of his head. “I should go now.”

Chanyeol was about to rush back inside but Jongdae takes him by the arm. “How can I give this back to you?”

“Just hand it over to Sehun.”

“You’re nice. Thank you, Chanyeol.” 

Chanyeol gives a curt nod before leaving. He’s not used to accepting gratitude or compliment without making the giver awkward so his best resort is to leave without saying anything. 

Besides, he worries about Yuki’s mood. 

When he got back inside the room - Yuki is all kinds of pissed. His brows are knit together and has his arms crossed to his chest. “Baby -”

Chanyeol is cut off when Yuki roughly stood from his chair. “I want to go home.”

The shorter walks past him and Chanyeol had to stop Yuki from going anywhere without telling him what’s wrong. He holds onto his fiance’s slim arm and made him look at him. “Hey, is everything okay?”

“I’m tired. I want to go home.” Yuki removesd Chanyeol’s hold onto his arm and walked out the room, leaving Chanyeol speechless. 

Chanyeol knows he has a lot to say - it’s on the tip of his tongue, and his mind was filled with nothing but worry. 

What did he do?

_Please tell me._

Apologizing is the usual thing he does when Yuki’s mad even though he doesn’t know know the reason why. Yoora told him he looked stupid for doing it and Chanyeol knows that very well, no need to point it out. 

Chanyeol wanted to run after Yuki the moment he bolts out the room but he still has to settle the payment for the reservation. He iswas relieved when he sees Yuki waiting for him at the front porch.

“Where’s your car?” Yuki asks, but before Chanyeol could even answer, the smaller scowls at him and starts voicing his frustration. “Chanyeol! Don’t tell me you brought your bike?”

“I did -” Chanyeol answers, trying to explain before things get more heated that it is “-because I overslept and it’s the fastest way for me to reach here.”

“You overslept?” Yuki is fuming, yet he tries to lower the volume of his voice. “You. Overslept. I’ve been reminding you of this day Chanyeol! It’s disappointing you come in late. You think I didnt notice you’re more interested with the patissier more than the things I’ve shown you for our wedding?-”

“No, baby.” Chanyeol is desperate to not be misunderstood as he tried to reach for Yuki’s hand, yet the shorter swatted him away. “It’s not - I’m not interested with Jongdae. You know I’m not, Yuki.”

“Then why aren’t you excited while we talk with Miss Ahn?”

“Because you know I don’t have the eye to decide -” 

“Chanyeol, it’s our wedding! Can't you be hands on with the preparation too? It feels like I’m the only one making efforts. It’s like I’m the only one looking forward to it.”

“My work -” Chanyeol bites his tongue as Yuki’s glare piercesd through his heart.

“That’s the thing!” Yuki cries with frustration? Exhaustion? No matter what reason it is, it put the taller into great guilt. 

Chanyeol reaches out to wipe the tears rolling down his fiance’s face but to no avail, again, his hand is swatted away. “You prioritize work over me! Over our wedding! I bet you overslept because you’re so engrossed with the data from AXIS, right? Work this! work that! Damn it Chanyeol! Maybe I should marry myself alone instead!”

“Yuki…”

“I don't want to talk to you.” the shorter sobs, turning his back on Chanyeol. “Maybe I shouldn't expect next time from you.”

Chanyeol is quick on his feet to walk over to Yuki who is probably booking his ride home on his phone and embraces him from behind, tightly and securely. He doesn’t want to part with heavy feelings especially with the shorter. “I’m sorry baby. I’m wrong. I didn't mean to make you feel irrelevant… I… my work… my work is a part of my life.”

“But you’re starting a life with me.” Yuki’s voice soften when Chanyeol gave the crook of his neck a kiss to calm him down. “This can’t continue… I don’t know how much I can go with this kind of set up, Chanyeol. This is so unfair…”

“I know.”

“And you’ll continue to choose your work over me. I hate it.” 

“I’ll make it right, Yuki..”

Chanyeol waits for an answer but Yuki carefully removed his embrace to face him. “Unless you properly sort out which is your priority, I don't think you can actually make it right with me, Chanyeol.”

*****

Chanyeol didn't go straight back to his apartment after splitting up with Yuki though it was the first thing that came up his mind. Rest is what he needs yet his heart was heavy because he made his fiance cry. He feels so hopeless because at the moment, he still has to do his job in AXIS and finish his responsibilities. Few cans of beer would probably help settle his emotions.

He takes a detour and drives to the place where he usually find peace whenever things don’t go well and he doesn't have the will to deal with it because of exhaustion. 

A comfort place he never told anyone, not even Yuki because unlike others, Chanyeol doesn't have any go to person when his mind is filled with doubts while his heart is hurting along with it.

He discovered the place when his mom died. He was a teen back then who can’t accept the sudden loss of the most important person in his life. Running away was the only thing in his mind to ease the pain. Chanyeol can't even stay at the wake because he can't accept that his mom is gone and he dislikes it when he’s unsure of what will happen after.

His mother was the only person who made him confident. A pillar that supports Chanyeol while growing. 

The secret place was a secluded and abandoned theme park. Most people finds the place eerie as the park was left to rust. Most of the structures were in ruins already and overgrown plants are everywhere. The park is used to be filled with liveliness and people, yet when the Capitol opened a larger attraction, the number of visitors plummeted. It was only a matter of years when the theme park was forgotten and eventually, closed down. 

You can’t actually venture further into the park but it doesn’t matter since Chanyeol only spends his quiet time at the kept castle structure The castle he frequents in is still properly maintained by the theme park owner who he chanced upon arriving. 

Mr. Ho, is already in his eighties, with white hair and beard but is still as strong as a bull. He still keeps the castle because it’s his child’s favorite part of the theme park. Unfortunately, she’s only alive in Mr. Ho’s memories. 

He had just finished clearing the snow out of the pathway when he noticed Chanyeol’s arrival.

“If it wasn't my favorite visitor - hey is that beer?” the old man stopsped his sweeping and greets Chanyeol playfully.

Chanyeol nods, giving his signature small smile. “It’s late already, Mr. Ho. Shouldn't you be at home and resting?” 

The old man playfully punched Chanyeol in the gut when the younger was an arm’s reach away. “What do you think of me? Old?”

“Yes.” Chanyeol kids, making the old man frown at him. “Biologically, you are old.” 

“You do know I could ban you in this place, right?” 

“But you wouldn’t.” Chanyeol snorts playfully. Both of them laugh together and comfortably. For a moment, Chanyeol forgot his dilemma.

“Liquors are banned in my place.” The old man noticed the black plastic he’s holding.

“Unless I give you one.” Chanyeol takes a can and hands it to the old man. “I have tteokbokki too. Care to join me upstairs?”

The man shakes his head, declining. “You only invited me because you feel indebted that I always welcome you here after having a rough day.” he chuckles. “You need your time alone.”

“Rough day?” Chanyeol has a questioning look on his face, “What makes you say that, Mr. Ho?”

“Your face” Mr. Ho motions his face. “says it all.” the old man shrugs. “By the way, the frown looks good on you but I’d rather see you smiling for real when you visit me. Half assed smile makes you look constipated.”

And maybe Chanyeol’s just too drained to hide how disheartened he was. Usually he’d try to put on a facade because he dislikes it when people notice and worry about him but that night, he doesn't care. 

“Am I supposed to take all of that as a compliment?”

“You young ones really are something.” The older man laughsed heartily and Chanyeol envies his youthful spirit. “Why would you associate looking constipated with complimenting? I don't get it!”

“I only wanted compliments. No need to be stingy.”

Mr. Ho decided to leave early that night and asked Chanyeol to just lock up. Since he’s a frequent visitor, the old man grew to trust him. They get to chat about a lot of things and as the years pass by, Mr. Ho treated him as a family. The old man knows him more than how his own father does and he probably felt that he really wanted an alone time. 

Mr. Ho’s stonekeep castle is a perfect replica of those that existed in the 12th and 13th century. There’s a palace inside the high walls but Chanyeol rarely spend time in it. Lighting up the palace would cost Mr. Ho a lot for electricity. If only the old man accept money from him then, he might frequent there. 

Anyway, Chanyeol likes the guard tower a lot. It provides him an exquisite view of the sky which is probably the only thing that can calm his nerves. Chanyeol sits on the battlements as he enjoys the view and his drinks quietly. 

The old owner scolds him whenever he stays on that part of the guard tower. It’s dangerous and he could fall with one wrong step but Chanyeol just loved being in high places. The air and the mood is different - it certainly clears his mind. The distraction of the faraway lights looks like stars twinkling so generously at him. 

It’s breathtaking.

By his fourth can of beer, Chanyeol started to feel his body warming against the cold winter breeze. He has high tolerance in alcohol but he’s not dependent to it like his father. Remembering what Mr. Ho said to him about safety, he jumps down the battlement and just stayed there standing, looking at the faint lights from the Capitol.

It comes across his mind the resemblance of it to Ippeuni’s healing chamber, yet then again, thoughts about Ippeuni is connected to the issue he’s been dealing with Yuki.

He sighed as his mind drifted to what Yuki told him before separating ways. It was frustrating as it dawns on him that Yuki is making him choose between him and the job he loves. 

Chanyeol has been thinking of ways where he can stay in his job without upsetting Yuki. He wasn’t this engrossed in his work before, until Ippeuni came in. Yuki had been the center of his universe and the sudden change of attention probably frustrated the latter. 

The archaeologist cursed at himself for not noticing how he drifted away from his old life with Yuki. He’s definitely making his fiance feel unimportant even though it’s not what he wanted to happen. They used to spend the weekends together, going on dates in fancy restaurants or just plainly chilling in his apartment. 

For the past six months, he can actually count by his two hands the times they had the usual cuddling and lazing around each other. 

What Yuki told him was a subtle ultimatum to make a choice. 

Sure, Chanyeol doesn't need to keep the job - his mother left them quite a fortune. He could start a small clinic of his own and be a normal husband to Yuki who he can see on a regular basis. 

However, quitting his job on AXIS was something he never thought of. It was more than a job - it’s his happy place. It’s where he can spend time with his father and do the thing he knows he’s good at. In AXIS, he feels there’s no need to put a defense. He can be as nerdy as much as he wants too. 

It’s home. 

Finding a job where you can actually feel at home is hard nowadays. 

He hates feeling empty for letting go of things that make him contented in life. He hates letting go in general but life has been really cruel to him. 

Chanyeol was quick to finish the cans of beer. He’s been weighing the pros and cons of making a decision, which should be his priority. If he chose to stay in AXIS, Yuki will be compromised. If he leaves AXIS, then he’s not really sure what’s up for him. 

It sucks.

But by the time the last drop of beer dropped in his mouth, Chanyeol has decided for the best. 

Or atleast, he tries to make himself believe it’s the best choice he could make.

******

The lab was empty when Chanyeol arrived. These are the rare times where the machines do the jobs they usually do when they’re not around. Alis was capable of taking care of Ippeuni. 

That enough made him convinced to firmly make a decision.

“Hi Alis. Could you give me a run down of Ippeuni’s condition?”

The AI was quick to show him a hologram tab - still the same as the last time he checked him. 

[Would you be needing anything else, Dr. Park?] 

Chanyeol sits on his station and opened his computer. “No, thank you - ah - on a second thought, can you show me the mail the Professor sent before?”

[One moment, Doctor.]

The mail flashes on Chanyeol’s monitor and reads it carefully. 

**Chanyeol.**

**I’ve received the invitation you sent me. It feels like yesterday when you’re still being carried by your mom, so small and curious of what I am doing in my study. Now, you’re going to start your own family.  
You’ve grown very well, my son. I am proud of you for being strong willed, independent and kind despite of the lack of fatherly figure from me. Buyoung raised you so well that it made me feel complacent you won't be needing me anymore. These are the things that I probably couldn't say to you in person but I apologize for not being a good father. **

**Your mom has been supportive of my career. She, not once, demanded time from me and cheered me on in the shadows for so many years instead. I was negligent of my duties as a husband to her and we lacked time together but she never got mad about it.**

**I regret it.**

**I regret being so absorbed with my work and whenever I see you work around with me, I get reminded of myself. I can see a workaholic man who missed a lot of his lovely children’s growth and I don't want you to be like me. I don't want you to regret in the end.**

**Your wedding will be on your birthday. The last time I was able to celebrate with you is when you turned one. It amazes me that I never heard you complain or get mad about it. I feel so sorry about the times that I shouldve been by your side.**

**I’m sorry that I wouldn't be able to be with you on that special day. I have prior commitments with the Governor about Ippeuni’s case that I cannot cancel anymore. I know it’s too much of me to ask for your understanding. You’re not orphaned. You and Yoora has an alive father and you personally asked my appearance on a special day in your adulthood yet here I am, missing it again. It feels like I’m dead already because of my absences. I’m sorry, Chanyeol. I really am.**

**I don't expect you to take this well but please do believe me that I’m upset I tied myself to work and I couldn't fix it.**

**If there’s one thing I want to ask of you, please don’t prioritize your work in AXIS. This organization that I built might be an ideal place for you but there’s nothing more ideal that to be with the people you love.**

**It’s a thought I want you to think about, son. Of course, I want you around the lab but your personal life - I want you to focus on it.**

**Focus on your soon-to-be married life. I don't want you to end up missing all the important moments with your family.**

**Know that whatever you choose, you will have my support and respect.**

**Congratulations on your upcoming wedding. Yuki is absolutely beautiful. He reminds me of your mother.**

**All the best and happiness for the both of you.**

**I’m really proud. Your mom in heaven is feeling the same too, for sure.**

**Let’s have a drink together other than coffee soon.**

**-Dad.**

Chanyeol sniffs, roughly wiping his nose with the sleeve of his sweater after his sight got blurry. It must be the influence of the alcohol that made him have an emotional range of a teaspoon. “You’re still a good dad.” Chanyeol whispers to himself as his fingers started typing on his keyboard, writing an email for his resignation with the formalities.

Maybe choosing to resign on his post is the best option. His father was right when he pointed out that he’s starting a family soon. Growing up without the guidance of his father was hard. If it’s not for his mom kind words about, he’d probably loathed the man. His mom had a hard time because his dad is always not around and it was lonely to witness her struggle as she longs for him. . 

The mail his dad wrote him is probably what he needs the most to be sure of his decision. 

The work? He can find another that can satisfy him. But the time and moments he could have with Yuki? Where in the world could he get that when he’s not with him? 

Chanyeol finished yet he hasn't sent the mail after composing it because he felt a strong urge to go to Ippeuni’s healing pod. It is weird because Chanyeol would always think of an acceptable reason before doing anything. He questions himself as to why he was pacing towards the unconscious boy. 

What does he want? _He’s not sure._

_Why was he opening the pod? _To have a clearer look.__

_[Doctor Park, it’s not Ippeuni’s scheduled check.]_

_Chanyeol knows._

_But he is already lost on looking at Ippeuni to answer Alis. There’s a great feeling of regret that he won't be able to see the boy open his eyes and regain consciousness once he resigns. For the past six months, Sehun grew on him when it comes to cheering on Ippeuni’s betterment._

_It might be a little portion of his mind,but, Ippeuni undeniably lives in it._

_His hand unconsciously reaches for the smaller’s head and gives him gentle pats akin to what he gives to their family pup. “I don't know why I feel bad when I look at you after making a decision, Ippeuni.” he heaves a deep sigh as his hand glided down to the sleeping boy’s cheeks._

_Soft. Supple. Warm. It’s understandable why Sehun took a liking of poking it once in awhile._

_“I -” Chanyeol couldn't find the words to come out his mouth easily. “when you first gave us a heartbeat… I was awestruck. I was never fascinated of heartbeats and life in general.. but… with you - it was so amazing. I’m like… a first time father hearing his newly born child.”_

_Chanyeol purses his lips, thinking how stupid he is to say farewell to Ippeuni. He probably wouldn't remember him after all the months they’ve been together if he wakes up. “You’re a fighter, you know that?” Chanyeol sighs once more. The heaviness in his chest doesn't subside._

_The longer he looks at Ippeuni, the harder it is for him to actually deliver the mail to his father._

_“Taking care of you is one of the nicest things I’ve done in my whole life. I feel at ease knowing that Sehun would do well on taking care of you even without me around.”_

_Chanyeol couldn't possibly figure out what came into his brilliant mind when his hand glided down the smaller’s face until it reaches his soft hands. He was quite unsure of the next thing he thought of doing because he knows it’s only been driven by his gut feel yet he remembered Jongdae earlier about following his gut feel though it’s hundred percent accurate._

__Maybe it wouldn't be so bad?_ _

_“If ...” Chanyeol paused, wrapping his hand around Ippeuni’s even smaller one gently “If I can I ask for a parting gift… then maybe… give us a response? Can you move a finger for me, Ippeuni?”_

_Chanyeol knows it was impossible for the boy to heed his request yet as he revels in the silence around the lab, but deep inside him he prayed for a miracle._

__Science doesn't believe in miracles, idiot._ He contradicts in his mind yet he couldn't stop hoping for it._

_He stood there idly, waiting for Ippeuni. His free hand kept on patting the latter’s head. “I would say take your time but… I, myself don't have enough time.. Ippeuni… It would mean a lot if you’ll give me motor responses. Should I pinch your finger? I bet if you’re awake, you’ll be mad at us for pinching your finger every time.” The archaeologist smiled fondly and wondered how he would look if he’s sulking or pouting. “Sorry, Ippeuni. We don't mean to hurt you like that.”_

_If he’s sober, he wouldn't be that soft on talking to Ippeuni - heck he wouldn't even be seen talking to the boy like how Sehun does on a daily basis._

_After minutes of admiring the calmness on Ippeuni’s sleep, Chanyeol felt that he has to stop his wishful thinking. The healing pod has been opened for a while now and it’s not advisable for Ippeuni’s condition to be exposed for that long._

_If he’s being truthful, Chanyeol would admit to feeling so heavy and regretful after he puts down Ippeuni’s hand and closes the pod. He walks over to his PC and successfully sent his resignation letter to his father._

_When everything is done, Chanyeol went on his phone to send Sehun a personal message about the resignation but changes his mind the last minute into inviting the younger to have a drink._

_Just as when he’s about to come out of the lab, Alis’ alarm designed for Ippeuni’s responses fills the area, making him freeze and stop on his track. His heart races with overwhelm._

_[Motor response detected. Finger movement. Recorded 1:09 AM]_

_Chanyeol wasted no time and rushes back to Ippeuni’s healing pod. “Alis open the pod. Check his vitals.”_

_The AI did what it was told while Chanyeol was shaking as he held Ippeuni’s hand. “Do it again, Ippeuni. Do it again.. Please…”_

_Chanyeol’s heart is nervous and anticipating. He gets ticked off with all the machines whirring around the silence but then it happens - Ippeuni moved a finger while he’s holding it. The archaeologist can’t believe that the response they’ve been anticipating to happen for the last six months is unfolding before him. “Yes. That’s right, Ippeuni. Good job!” he exclaims, and then proceeds on pinching the boy’s thumb._

_He’s smiling unconsciously when Ippeuni reacted to the pain inflicted but the realization that this will be the last time he might probably witness this moment with Ippeuni makes his heart ache._

_There is a thought playing at the back of his mind, so silly that he’s quick to discard it - after all, it’s impossible._

_Is Ippeuni bidding him goodbye? Is Ippeuni trying to stop him? That’s absurd to even think about._

_“Alis. call Sehun and notify him of the recorded response. Send the data to Professor Park, too.”_

__Can you retract my resignation letter?_ _

_Chanyeol chewed on his lower lip and stopped himself. _He’s decided. He shouldn't change his mind anymore.__

_And he should have let go of Ippeuni’s hand already yet his body seemed to feel too familiar with the sensation of their palms against each other._

_Chanyeol doesn't want to let go._


	2. < d u a >

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chanyeol is bothered by dreams and sparkles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! sorry the update is behind the schedule! should've uploaded it earlier! please check end notes okay

_sayang… pulanglah… sayang..._

“No!” Chanyeol shouts, jolting up from his bed as he wakes from a dream he’s been having consistently for the past week after quitting his job. He can feel his heart throbbing so loudly, making him pant like crazy. He feels lightheaded and in distraught, disabling him to recognize his surroundings for a second. 

He looks around and recognizes he’s in Yuki’s room because of the vanilla scent from the scented candle filling the air he breathed. From his recollection, his fiance lit it to bring up the mood of their love making night. He immediately whips his head to his left and felt at ease to see that Yuki isn’t disturbed and is still deeply asleep. He pulled the comforters to cover Yuki’s bare body when he feels the cold air from the AC touch his skin. With a kiss on the latter’s forehead, Chanyeol gets up from their shared bed quietly and went out of the room to calm his nerves. 

With nothing but only his boxers on him, Chanyeol goes straight to Yuki’s kitchen and finds a can of beer inside the fridge. He’s trying to forget his dream because it’s bothering him so much and chugging alcohol is his resort so he can drift back to sleep with his fiance.

The dream he’s been having is vivid wherein he’s running along an unfamiliar place - an ethnic village filled with one storey sturdy looking stone house roofed with what seems to be dried _cogon_ grass to be exact - barefooted, chasing a voice that’s speaking a language he’s not aware of. 

_Sayang. Pulanglah_

The words uttered in his dream made him frantic, and scared as it gets clearer and clearer yet the soiled road in his dream was endless and he can't seem to find where the person calling him is.

It definitely feels like the voice is calling to him and it bothers Chanyeol that he feels extremely concerned of the voice because of the urgency… it’s frustrating on his end because he felt like the call is desperate for help.

Desperate for him. 

He grips on the can unconsciously, crumpling the metal like a thin paper with the pressure of the tightness of his grip. It’s a good thing nothing is spilled because he already finished all of it.

Chanyeol feels weird, trying to push the dream out of his head but fails miserably. Oftentimes, he would daze all of a sudden with the recollection of the dream and during those times, there’s always a heavy feeling lingering in his chest.

He desperately wants it gone but no amount of distraction made it disappear.

He buries his face on his palms, trying to coax the unexplainable void he’s feeling as if it would lessen the unsettledness. 

Chanyeol ends up rummaging Yuki’s cupboard cabinet to find a stronger drink that can help him get sleepy. Luckily, his fiance keeps a bottle of rum probably for special occasions. He takes a coffee mug from the drawer and pours the liquor generously until it is filled, almost spilling a little. 

After putting the bottle back in the cupboard, Chanyeol trudges onpaves his way to the living room and stands by the glass windows that gives him a good view of the city. 

Maybe if he thinks about their upcoming wedding, the dream would gradually leave his mind. 

He puts the mug on his lips to gulp down the alcohol and his face contorted unpleasantly with the taste - he forgot to put ice of all things but he’s too lazy to move around already. 

Chanyeol then noticed the boxes stacked against the walls in Yuki’s living room. Five days till their wedding and it’s nice to think of finally living together with the person you love all your life. 

Their soon-to-be home is where Chanyeol proposed to Yuki. It’s a lavish house situated in the Capitol that definitely completes Yuki’s dream married life. It’s so happens that his mother left him a property and to match it with his fiance’s taste, he asked Yoora to help him renovate it. 

He’s looking forward to the life with Yuki. He really is. Yet, something feels lacking. 

Chanyeol really wants to know if he’s just getting the wedding scares that’s why he’s been having the same dream over and over again or it’s somehow connected to his resignation in AXIS. If only there’s someone he can talk to about it - then maybe, the man can have his heart at peace.

*****

The persistent hits of his own pillow made Chanyeol stir awake. It’s a Saturday and having that same bothering dream last night made him lose a lot of sleep time.

The sunlight ruthlessly hurting his eyes is not enough to urge him to get up. He’s determined to continue his sleep for about a few hours more.

“Chanyeol you have to get up now!” 

Yoora’s voice echoed inside the room but Chanyeol’s eyelids are heavy. It has a mind of it’s own and chooses not to open. “Chanyeol! I know you’re awake already! Get up you lazy beanstalk.” 

His sister’s voice is loud enough to wake him. He could hear her walk around his room, mumbling about how much of a mess his room is. Chanyeol could only groan as he pulls up his comforters to cover his whole body. 

“Don't make me say it again for the third time, Park Chanyeol.” Yoora warns sternly and firmly. Chanyeol could practically picture his sister having her hands on both sides of her waist. “We have to visit mom!”

Chanyeol sits up, scratching his head that looks like a messed up bird nest. “This is too early, Yoora.” Chanyeol whines as he rubs his eyes like a kid. He’s not a morning person to begin with and Yoora happens to have all the patience in the world when it comes to waking him up. 

Actually, Yoora has all the patience in the world to deal with him. 

The older stops picking up his clothes from the floor after putting it on the hamper she’s carrying. “It’s nine already - what early are you talking about?”

“I’m unemployed, what do you expect?”

“More reason for you to stop lazing around! And honestly, Chanyeol look at your room!” 

Chanyeol raises a brow at her. “What about it?”

“This is a serious mess.” the older woman spats. “Does unemployment makes one untidy?”

“You just motioned all of my room, Yoora.” the younger continues to frown. “Can we tone down the nagging. It’s my birthday tomorrow. Be nice.”

Yoora huffs at him. “Ever since you quit AXIS, you started living like this.”

“I’m just tired with the wedding preparations. That’s all.” The younger doesn't have the energy to argue anymore as he looks around and realizes he’s living like how Sehun is in the lab. His study table is filled with print outs and copies of history books with various studies about primitive life before the era of the three kingdoms. No matter how hard Chanyeol restrains himself, his curiosity about Ippeuni still lives inside him and he can't help but do self research despite being out of AXIS. 

Yoora crosses her arms and gave Chanyeol a doubting stare like that of a mom’s when her child is hiding something. Chanyeol couldn't handle being stared at that’s why he decides to escape her by finding his phone somewhere in his bed

“You know, for someone who’s going to marry his first love, you look uneager?”

Chanyeol nods as answer to his older sister because he is occupied on finding his phone. Once he successfully found it, he immediately checks if he has a reply from Yuki. 

“Chanyeol. Aren't you spoiling Yuki a little?” Yoora asks worriedly and it speaks volumes to Chanyeol who tries his best not to feel upset when he sees his messages unread. 

Yuki was with his friends last night. They were actually together, watching a movie his fiance has been dying to watch with him in his apartment but then his friends surprised the latter with a sudden visit. Chanyeol didn't mind when Yuki was dragged by his friends for a small bachelor’s party they prepared for him. Yuki has always been the social one and he doesn't find any reason why he should refrain Yuki from going without him. 

He trusts him and he never once thought of making Yuki turn like him who prefers staying at home. 

Although, there’s a big feeling of loneliness when Yuki left him and the movie they’re supposed to be watching together, Chanyeol tried his best to shrug it off and pin his attention to something else. 

At first, he thought of asking Sehun how’s Ippeuni but since he’s resigned already, everything about the boy is already confidential. 

“What do you mean spoiling?” Chanyeol gets up from his bed lazily, grabbing a white shirt and quickly wearing it. 

“I just feel like you’re spoiling him too much. The furniture he bought using your card are all uselessly expensive.” Yoora says frankly. “And I rarely see him spoil you unlike before when your relationship is still fresh?”

“He doesn't need to spoil me -”

“Okay. Let me rephrase. He doesn't support and understand you enough.” 

Chanyeol didn't know what to answer because somehow, it’s partly true but the denial inside him is convincing. “What’s for breakfast?” he asks, subtly changing the topic.

“Denial and evasion.” The older answers quickly, frowning. Chanyeol gives her a face full of disbelief. “Fine. I get it. You don't want to talk about this but you can't blame me for opening it up. I’ve been noticing how he treats you. He keeps on ordering you this and that, demanding you to do this and that and it’s very one sided.”

“We’re just having misunderstandings okay. It’s not that serious. Most couples quarrel over stuff, Yoo.”

“Yuki gets mad at you over the simplest things and demands -” Yoora whispers but when she felt Chanyeol staring at her as if he’s pleading her not to worry anymore, the older gives up. “Get out and eat. I’ll clean this mess.” 

Chanyeol is thankful that his sister understood him. He walks to her and took the hamper from her hold and smiles. “Come and eat with me. I’ll arrange that later.”

Yoora prepared American breakfast for Chanyeol and it’s already laid out on the dining table when the both of them went out of the younger’s room. “You prepared a lot.” Chanyeol notices, pulling a chair for Yoora first. 

“I always prepare lot. You’re a big eater.” 

What Yoora said was true. Eating heavily during breakfast is what their late mother instilled in him. She, too, is a good cook just like Yoora and their mother told them that breakfast is the most important meal of the day and they can't miss it. Chanyeol’s lucky because Yoora cooks like their mom, he had no problem eating her food. 

Usually, whenever Yoora cooks for him every morning, she would be the one who’ll put food in his plate but Chanyeol wanted to be grateful for all the years that Yoora spent time taking care of him that morning. 

He places pancake on her plate and poured chocolate syrup on it. The older is obviously taken aback because she’s not expecting Chanyeol to remember that she’s more into chocolate than maple syrup when it comes to pancakes. “Is this enough?” Chanyeol ask. “Yoora, diabetes! You’ll get diabetes with this amount so tell me to stop.”

The older giggles, stopping Chanyeol from making a chocolate soup on her plate. The next food Chanyeol places on her plate is strips of bacon and a sunny side up egg. 

“Do you need anything, Park Chanyeol?”

Chanyeol gasps, pretending to be offended. “You think so lowly of me, Park Yoora”

“Just checking if this sweetness needs something in return. My flower shop is not earning well so cash payments is impossible. Don't push your luck.”

“Then why don't you try applying to an institute so you can use your degree as a botanist?”

Despite being a licensed professional, Yoora chose to start a flower farm rather than actually practicing what she studied. She grows the flowers she sells in her shop and they’re actually pretty. It’s just that people nowadays doesn't actually appreciate it. 

“I’d rather not imprison myself in a lab, thank you very much.” the older chirps. “Back to where we are earlier?”

The younger groans as he gets his own food. “You really like making me say embarrassing things, aren't you?” 

Yoora cuts a piece of pancake before answering nonchalantly, trying to tease Chanyeol some more. “I mean, if you have something to say, then say it, nerd. You won't be able to have me after you get married. Yuki will do everything I used to do for you.”

Chanyeol snorts quietly as he plays on his food absentmindedly. That’s a nice scenario that could only happen in his imagination. Yuki is definitely not the housewife type. The shorter is busy with his work, so it’s automatic that he will not have the time to cook for him. Yuki grew up with maids to do chores for him. They’ll still probably hire one after their honeymoon. 

It’s funny because Chanyeol used to see Yuki like his mom who doesn't need words to give you what is needed. She gives and offers everything and takes care of people dear to her diligently. It’s what he pictured for his married life but Chanyeol knows best that putting up expectations like that on Yuki would never happen.

Yoora reaches for his ear and pulls at it playfully to put him back to his senses “Hey. It’s my recognition day today as the best sister in the world. Give me what I deserve, Jesus.” 

“Don't pull it like that -” Chanyeol complains, swatting Yoora’s hand away. “You’re really good to me but the teasing, it needs to stop! And stop picking up unnecessary things from Sehun."

"That genius kid is cute. He calls you Jesus hyung when you have your hair down and it's so funny!" The older chirps. "You know, as your lovely sister, I could actually use some compliments right now. I feel sad that I won't have anyone to take care of after tomorrow."

Yoora maybe smiling at him, eating her food vigorously but Chanyeol can perceive that she’s feeling otherwise. Their mom died when he just turned seventeen because of a tragic accident and Yoora was given the responsibility of taking care of their family despite her young age. She juggled being a parent to him and a thoughtful daughter to their only living parent while working her ass off being a scholar in the university. Yoora’s amazing because she never felt burdened of taking care of them. Most people would tell her that she could actually just focus on living her life but the older refuses to. 

_I’ll miss being taken care of you. Chanyeol wants Yoora to know that but his stubborn self won't let him. “Eat your food.”_

__

******

Chanyeol has his knees aching as soon as he reaches the top of the hill where their mother’s grave is. Yoora has the time to laugh at his misery because she’s nearly finished setting up the mat and the lunch she prepared under the shade of a huge mahogany tree.

He sometimes question why his father placed their mother in their secluded, family owned ecological land far away from the Capitol but then he remembers how much of a nature person their mom is. She likes the tranquility amidst all the greeneries and if there’s anything their father wants for her, then that would be a peaceful resting place. 

“You’re just thirty, why are you acting like some old man with arthritis.” Yoora comments, making fun of him again. 

“Please continue on what you’re doing and don't mind me.” he replies, taking a seat near the tree so he can rest his back and stretch out his legs. He watches Yoora put out stacks of tupperware out of the picnic basket. “Why did you prepare a lot?”

“It’s mom’s favorite foods.” Yoora pulls out a picture frame and places it atop of the picnic basket and then offered the daisies she handpicked from her farm. “Hey mom, looking good as ever are we?”

Chanyeol agrees - their mother’s photo smiles so brightly and beautifully at them. He misses her and her soft voice calling his name. 

“It’s Chanyeol’s wedding tomorrow. Dad can’t come because of work. I’m the only family Chanyeol have since he didn't invite any relatives. See how distant this kid is? He took a lot from Dad. I think you will be really amused by it.”

The younger stayed quiet as he listens to Yoora talk as if their mom is around to listen physically. It’s true that he didn't invite their relatives because he’s not really close to them. His father’s side of the family is out of the picture because Professor Park is already an orphan at a very young age with no siblings to be with. He hasn't seen them for years and he actually wanted his wedding to be an exclusive and personal event. His close colleagues from college are busy with their work to actually come on his wedding day. Sehun who promised to come would not make it too because he’s tied up with paper jobs in AXIS after he left. 

Chanyeol didn't mind the absence, really. He might be stubborn but just like Yoora, he has a great understanding towards everything. People have different priorities and he doesn't take it personally when he's not included in theirs.

“See, mom. This beanstalk really makes me worried.” Yoora pouts, pulling Chanyeol out of his trance. “I feel like something’s wrong but he’s not telling me. Lately he’s been lethargic and often spacing out.”

“Yoora. It’s not something to fuss about.”

“Well, it’s alarming me. It’s not the typical concentrated Chanyeol I know so maybe I won't shut up until you tell me.” The older ranted. “Mom won't be pleased if you keep that in. We promised to keep each other’s back, right?”

Chanyeol glances at the portrait of their mother and felt guilty. “Fine.” He sighs, defeated and it somehow made Yoora accomplished. “I think I miss my job.”

“Of course you do.” Yoora says as a matter of factly. “You know I’m really surprised you resigned. You never said a word about it.”

“Yuki felt that I prioritize work over him after -” Chanyeol pauses because he almost mentioned Ippeuni to Yoora. The older doesn't have any idea they’ve been keeping a boy in the lab, “the special assignment the Governor gave us. And I admit, I was so absorbed with the study. Yuki hated it -”

“He hates seeing you happy with your work?” Yoora asks, baffled when Chanyeol turned his head away, not wanting to answer. “Have you told him that you love your job?”

Chanyeol sighs, looking beyond the green trees down the hill. “If I told him, I don't think he’d understand.”

The older can't help but to sigh her disappointment. She reaches out for the basket and took two cans of beer, handed one to Chanyeol and kept the other one for her. Chanyeol gladly accepts it because he doesn't want to think that Yuki’s unsupportive with the things he wants to do. 

“I may sound biased since I am always on your side but knowing Yuki who grew up having the world at his feet, it’s selfish of him to make you decide on leaving your job because he felt your job weighs heavier than him.” Yoora had always been frank about how she dislikes few of Yuki’s slanted characters. Chanyeol just continued chugging down his beer like he doesn't have a burning feeling as it goes down his throat. “Okay, let’s say you’ve been a little busy for the past six or seven months but compare it to the years you devoted supporting him? I don't want to invalidate his feelings but being in a committed relationship includes trust, support and understanding. It shouldn't be one-sided.”

“It’s my fault anyways.” Chanyeol laughs but Yoora returned it with a scowl. “I neglected him and became a hermit. I think resigning is the right answer for us not to have any conflicts anymore.” 

“You know it’s not _right_ if deep inside here -” Yoora points a finger by his chest “is messed up.”

Chanyeol exchanges a silent staring game with his older sister. There are hundreds of thoughts coming inside Chanyeol’s mind, enough to make him confused again, yet, he feels so good with this confusion. He takes Yoora’s hand and repositions it on his heart because the older is pointing at his sternum. “Know your anatomy, Park Yoora.”

“I’m a botanist.” The older retorts. “Is that why you’re losing sleep lately?”

“Ah. That.” Chanyeol eyes the untouched tupperware beside Yoora and the older instinctively offered the rice balls in it. “I’ve been having this weird dream and it bothers me a lot...” 

“Ohh.” Yoora coos, teasing Chanyeol a little. “That’s new? Tell me more about it.”

And so Chanyeol shares his bizarre dream with the older. The details. The voice. The weird feeling of familiarity he felt in his heart every time he wakes up - he tells Yoora all of it. He thought it would be hard for someone to listen to his nonsense about the dream but his older sister proved him wrong.

“You know, since the shop isn't busy and I don't have that much of chores, I tend to skim through articles over the net that I find interesting.” Yoora manages to speak and munch on the kimchi pancake she cooked at the same time. “I read this article about how past life memories are showcased in dreams? They say when you sleep, you’re one much closer to divinity because of the subconscious mind taking in control. There are dreams that are just normal dreaming states and there are dreams that apparently show who you were in your past life. I know you’re a man of science and you don't really believe on things like these so tell me if I’m talking a lot.”

Chanyeol, feeling full of the food he has eaten laid on his back and flashes an assuring smile at the elder. “I’m interested in the concepts of past life. Go on.”

“Few experts about this whole karma thingy say how we are all connected to our past lives - that our lives is a cycle and if we died with few issues unresolved in our past, it will recur in our present lives? Unless it is resolved, unless our lives were lived according to destiny, the cycle won't stop. There’s a reason why you’re aloof or why you have a birthmark on your chest and it all boils down to how you lived in your past life.”

Chanyeol stays quiet and thought about how he lied to the older a while ago about being interested in the concept, yet, somehow he’s getting pulled into what Yoora’s telling.

“The historical details… the exhibition of unlikely behaviors… your dream is something you can't control and it’s repeating and unchanging… you are gravely affected by it that it doesn't leave your mind. Deep inside you, you know it’s not just a dream and that it’s imprinted in you. Maybe your dream is revealing a spiritual issue rooted from your past life that you weren't able to resolve.”

Chanyeol breathes in deeply. “That’s creepy and weird.”

“I know!” Yoora lays down beside Chanyeol and had the younger stretch his arm so she has something to rest her head on. “But the idea is cool. It made me curious of how I am in my past life. Are we like still siblings? Maybe I’m a princess of a tribe before.” 

“Maybe you’re a peasant since you’re so good on serving everyone dear to you.” Chanyeol grins but then Yoora pinches him on his armpits to stop his teasing. “I wonder if I told Yuki about this dream, what would be his reaction?” 

“What do you think? I can feel that you already know the answer.” 

Chanyeol keeps himself quiet - of course he already have the answer since he knows his fiance so well. Yuki would most probably laugh at him and shrug it off. That thought made him lonely. 

It is so timely for Chanyeol to stray away from the unwanted thoughts when his phone starts to vibrate in his pocket. He picks it up right away when he sees Sehun’s number flashing on the screen. 

“Sehun, what’s up?”

_“Hyung.”_ Sehun groans over the line, making Chanyeol sense that something’s wrong. _“Ah.. hyung… help…”_

“Sehun what’s wrong?” Chanyeol quickly gets up to his feet. Sehun’s in pain, no second thinking about the way he continuously groans over the other line. “Sehun!” 

_“Ippeuni… Ippeuni’s gone… Hyung… he shouldn’t be out there… he’s… scared… help...”_

“Sehun, what? What are you talking about?”

_“Ippeuni’s awake, hyung. He’s awake…”_

  
Chanyeol was alarmed with Sehun’s phone call and speedily drives his way to the manor without any second thoughts. It’s a waste that he and Yoora had to cut their day short but the older understands upon seeing how frightened Chanyeol was after taking the call. 

Of course Yoora’s questions are piled up but she knew very well that whatever the phone call must be about, it’s very important to Chanyeol. She didn't hold him back further and let him go.

When Chanyeol arrives at the manor, the first place he thought of searching is the lab, yet, he forgot that he doesn't have any access in the facility anymore. He feels at a loss knowing for a fact that as time passes by, Ippeuni is out there, probably confused and terrified with the present-day environment he’s in. That idea is enough for Chanyeol to be gravely worried.

He goes back upstairs and notices the fallen vases on his way to the master’s bedroom. From there, he knew that something happened. He carefully walks into the room, trying to avoid stepping on the debris and soil on the carpeted floor and making an added mess.

It wasn't a shock to see the room empty but it was the mess inside that actually alarmed Chanyeol. The king sized bed was unmade as if someone laid there. There’s a fallen IV stand on the side and a tray of food scattered on the floor.

There are also blood splattered on the floor and Chanyeol couldn't stay still as he dials Sehun’s number again and again and again.

By the sixth ring, Sehun’s phone picks up but Chanyeol knew it wasn't the younger who’s on the line.

_“Chanyeol-ssi? Hi. It’s Jongdae. C-could you pick him up here in my shop?”_

“What happened?” he asks frantically, his feet automatically paces to the front door. He then noticed there are still blood stains, following a path outside the gates. “Is Sehun’s foot okay?”

_“Hold a sec.”_

Chanyeol wishes it was Sehun’s blood - because if it’s Ippeuni’s then the more reason he needs to find him

_“His feet are okay. Uhm.. Can you come?”_

Chanyeol curses. The blood belongs to Ippeuni.

“I’ll be there.”

  
Jongdae is treating Sehun’s wounds when Chanyeol arrived at his bake shop. Worry is evident on his face as he came closer to the table where they are both seated.

The younger’s clothes were dirtied of soil, the side of his head injured and his arms had fresh scratches the he probably got from a harsh fall on the ground. Sehun tries to stand up with the sight of Chanyeol but Jongdae is quick to damp the cotton on his wound deeply, making him weak with the sudden pain. “Aw! Is that necessary -”

“You were hit by a car so sit down.” The patissier’s tone is authoritative, making Sehun quiet down on his chair. He looks at Chanyeol and gave a relieved glance. “This person is troublesome.”

“What happened?” Chanyeol asks as he scans Sehun. He’s badly injured on his observation.

“I was on my way back here when I saw this dumbass carelessly crossing the street with the green light on.” Jongdae answers, harshly applying more pressure on Sehun’s wounds. He sounded so alarmed and annoyed and it’s probably because he’s shocked with what he witnessed. “All for a puppy! A puppy Chanyeol-ssi! He’s ready to die for a lost puppy for Christ’s sake! And he refuses to be rushed to the hospital? I can't believe this!”

Sehun and Chanyeol exchanges knowing glances with each other. it’s good that the younger still has his consciousness even after being hit, enough to make up excuses. “I told you, I’m okay! I’m really okay - the puppy… it has injuries and it’s cold! I can't let him out for long like this.” Sehun exclaims but the patissier didn't seem to buy his claim and continues cleaning his injury hashly.

Chanyeol takes a chair to sit on and started checking Sehun’s body. He lifts the younger’s arm and keenly notices the slight wincing he did. He then applied pressure on the younger’s sides using his two fingers, making him shout in pain.

“Hyung! That hurts!”

“Hospital it is.” Chanyeol concludes. “Get yourself checked if you have bone fractures.”

“I don't have any -”

“Jongdae-ssi.” Chanyeol cuts Sehun from objecting anymore by directing to the patissier. “Do you have painkillers and ice pack?”

“Yeah.” Jongdae nods. “I’ll go get it in my office.”

Chanyeol mumbles a quiet _thank you_ to the patissier. When the place is clear after Jongdae made a run inside a room that seemingly appears to be the kitchen, Chanyeol felt safe to ask Sehun what happened.

Sehun, though it’s against protocol to say something about Ippeuni to non-AXIS personnel, started telling what had happened. Days ago, Ippeuni finally opened his eyes but the boy was still groggy from being unconscious for so many years. Sehun was instructed to transfer Ippeuni out of the pod and have him recuperate in the master’s bedroom. Chanyeol finds the dedication Sehun has for Ippeuni immense because the younger was basically camping in the manor, spending day and night watching and waiting for him to have the energy to get up. The person who should be shifting schedules with Sehun backed out after knowing that his job description would practically pull him out of his normal life and it led Sehun to be the only person in charge.

“I should’ve restrained him and prepared for the worst case scenario.” Sehun groans, burying his face in his hands. Chanyeol then notices the bite mark on Sehun’s arm. “Of course confusion and fright would be his first reaction once he regains his consciousness but hyung - I just don't have the heart to… cuff him on his bed. Ippeuni is… just a boy… He’s human… I couldn't just… bring myself to chain him hyung… then he went violent.. I was about to give him sedatives but the next thing I know I was knocked out. I wasn't able to calm him down.”

Chanyeol understands where Sehun is coming from. For the past six months, the younger wants nothing but for Ippeuni to open his eyes because he cares for him deeply.

But he shouldn't have let his sympathy took over him. Restraining Ippeuni is a protocol, a must to avoid this kind of situation because panic is the automatic reaction to everything around him. Who knows if the boy had gone through traumatic experiences before having himself frozen?

“I need to find him.” Sehun stands up, but Chanyeol grabs him on the wrist to make him sit down. “Hyung. Please let go - it’s snowing outside.”

“In your state, do you think you’ll be able to find him?”

“But it’s harsh out there for him!” Sehun argues. “Hyung… please… I was the reason why this happened and I can't have Ippeuni suffer because of my mistakes. He doesn't know anything in this time. It’s the least thing I could do for now.”

“I’ll find him.”

Sehun’s eyes widen in shock with what Chanyeol told him. “Hyung. It’s your wedding tomorrow. you can’t do that.”

“Make sure you’re okay before you search for him tomorrow. For now, I’ll find him and try to bring him back” Chanyeol pats Sehun’s shoulder, making him at ease. “Have yourself treated properly, Sehun.”

“But hyung -”

Jongdae’s arrival is just in time to cut Sehun.

“Are you leaving now?” Jongdae questions, raising a brow at Chanyeol who just stood up from his seat. “Can you put some senses first in this guy that he should go to the hospital -”

“Sehun will go.” Chanyeol smiles at Jongdae, making the patissier blush on his place. “Your first aid is quite helpful to Sehun. Thank you.”

“N-no p-problem.”

“I’ll call an ambulance.” and without waiting for a reply, Chanyeol runs out of the shop to start his search.

Chanyeol didn't know why he’s out in the snowy day just to find Ippeuni when the boy should already be the least of his concern - he has his wedding tomorrow yet his heart is troubled and restless with him gone missing.

He doesn't even know where he should start searching. Chanyeol is just running around checking every nook, every alley, every public place his feet could lead him. And with the weather they have, even with thick clothing he has, Chanyeol can still feel the cold seeping through his skin.

What more to Ippeuni? The last time he saw him, he’s wearing nothing but a hospital gown - a thin fabric that is bare on the sides. he doesn't even have shoes on him.

Chanyeol stops by a playground all of a sudden when the sight of a kid playing alone in the swings all by himself out in the cold pulled him out in his deep thinking. The scenario pulls him in, as it reminded him of how he was as a child, so used on playing alone until Yuki’s family moved in the neighbourhood. He retreats himself from going in further as he remembers that he’s still out for a reason and that is to search for Ippeuni.

For sure, with Ippeuni’s injuries, he still hasn't gotten far.

Chanyeol then continued his search. It will be difficult for him and especially for Ippeuni if they’d still be out till dark.

The archaeologist didn't expect things to be easier - if he has, he wouldn't still be out walking along the busy sidewalk with a coffee in his hand, trying to figure out where in the world would Ippeuni be. He has been walking around the vicinity for the third time now and he’s feeling the exhaustion already in his body, mainly on his feet. The night, though young, alarms Chanyeol yet he can’t stop looking because of the fact that he still hasn't found Ippeuni. 

He looks around and finds himself walking into the empty playground that intrigued him earlier. It’s cold and he’s feeling the soreness of his joints from non stop running. A ten minute break would actually suffice for him to rest.

He sits down under a shed facing the playhouse to start thinking as the snow falls harsher than he expected. “This won't do.” Chanyeol hisses his irritation as he puts the cup lid near his mouth, not drinking yet. He’s too focused with thinking where he should start searching again when he barely started resting.

If he’s Ippeuni, where would he hide? Surely, he would stay away from crowds so the main roads are not an option. What would be the safest place for a primitive boy like him?

The archaeologists frowns as he thinks deeper. 

Then it hits him.

Forests.

Having an answer finally urges Chanyeol to sip on his neglected coffee. If his guess is right, Ippeuni would probably search for a forest-like place and there’s only one place in the city filled mostly with trees - the Metropolitan Park conserved by the Government from generations to generations. It’s one of the most important historic sites available in the Capitol and it’s only filled with people during the day because of tours. 

As soon as he finishes his coffee, Chanyeol decides to continue his search at the park but his eyes caught a weird sparkle inside the playhouse the halted him from going.

There was this intense feeling of being drawn to that sparkle despite the fact that he’s unsure whether he’s just seeing things. And as if he’s being pulled, Chanyeol slowly walks his way to the playhouse. 

His heart was throbbing weirdly with every step he took. He thinks maybe it’s the coffee but then, he sees the sparkle twinkle once.

Twice.

Thrice.

There’s something inside the playhouse, no doubt. 

Just when he’s about to reach the playhouse, the phone inside his pocket vibrated continuously. He stops on his tracks to check and it’s all from Yoora, asking where he is. 

Then he remembered that he is scheduled to check in the hotel for their wedding tomorrow. How could he even forget?

Ah. Right. 

The unread message under Yoora’s messages was the answer. 

For the whole day, he’s trying to stay away from using his phone because he’s been flooding Yuki with too many messages because his fiance hasn't picked up any of his calls and responded to any of his messages. He wonders what’s the matter to the point that he even called Yuki’s parents to check on him. They said Yuki’s been sleeping for the whole day because of a hangover.

Chanyeol was relieved and glad that Yuki was able to come home safe after the party but he’s disappointed that he drank too much and forgotten about contacting him. He then remember Yoora’s sentiments about his fiance earlier that day.

_It’s one sided._

_Yuki demands this and that but he couldn't even do the same for you._

“I shouldn't be thinking about this right now.” Chanyeol mumbles to himself with so much worry egging him to be pissed. He’s not really a fan of getting angry because it is draining and nothing is actually solved if you do let your emotions get to you. 

He can deal with Yuki maybe after their wedding and talk about the things that bothers him. His plan to go back in AXIS, their relationship with one another - everything that requires his full honesty.

There’s nothing wrong with adjusting, as Chanyeol does it on his own volition but he wants to get the same support and understanding from Yuki.

It’s not being demanding right?

His thoughts are cut off when a stray cat comes out of the playhouse and the archaeologist can’t help but to kneel down and pat it’s head when it started purring on his ankles. “Was that you, little one?” he smiles a little, thinking that the sparkle came from the cat’s eyes. “Go somewhere warm.” Chanyeol says quietly as he sends the cat away.

The archaeologist leaves the playground without looking back.

And in the dim of the night, the sparkle twinkles once..

twice..

thrice.

It remained twinkling where Chanyeol saw it all through the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you to my ever supportive ate beta @baekyeolkr for helping me highlight what i wanted to highlight in this chapter! huhuhuhu i know it's hard for you to deal with yuki and the slowburn (she's not a fan so idk if checking a slowburn fic despite the dreadful yuki popping here and there is not considered love then idk what it is!! thank uu <3) 
> 
> i swear it's not my intention to make my betas mad about Yuki! hehehe it just happened :D
> 
> also!! big thank you my very soft aina (@11cmkiss) for helping me with the translations!
> 
> i'd love to hear your thoughts hihi! thank you for reading


	3. < t i g a >

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a wedding. a meeting. a heartbreak.

Chanyeol arrives at the hotel room where he’s supposed to stay for their wedding preparations late and Yoora didn't let him get away with it that easily.

“No text, no call. What is wrong with you Chanyeol!? How hard is it for you to dial my number!? You got me so worried sick last night and now you’ll show up looking dog tired?” His older sister starts nagging as he was pulled inside the bedroom where it’s away from the wedding coordinator. Yoora’s pissed, it was obvious but she would always nag at him in private. “You were supposed to check in last night but guess what I learned at the front desk? You didn't show up! What happened, Chanyeol? tell me now or I swear my makeup will get ruined -”

Chanyeol sits on the edge of the bed, and the softness of it is inviting him to spend an hour or two for awhile. He looks at Yoora, dressed in pastel peach gown, looking so beautiful but the scowl on her face ruins everything and he admits it’s his fault and that he has no excuses.

It was a rough night being out in the cold and Chanyeol is so frustrated that he hasn't found Ippeuni at all. It’s a good thing that Sehun’s overnight in the hospital is enough for him to actually take over in the search.

Sehun told him not to worry and he should only focus on his wedding but Chanyeol can't bring himself to disregard Ippeuni. It’s weird to feel worry over someone he only met six months ago but Chanyeol, no matter how much he denies it, gives importance to Ippeuni’s well being especially now that he’s awake just like Sehun.

Yoora notices that Chanyeol was out of it, not listening to her anymore. She looks at her watch and paces towards the younger. “Chanyeol.”

“Yoo, can I explain next time?”

“You still have an hour to sleep.” She says calmly. Piecing Chanyeol’s actions bit by bit to know what he’s feeling is what Yoora’s good at. The older shots an understanding gaze at Chanyeol. She knows that Chanyeol’s tired from whatever he did last night. Yes, it’s alarming but Yoora trusts his younger brother. He’s not out there for some petty reason. It was probably important. “I’ll wake you up.”

“Would it be really okay?” Chanyeol hesitates but Yoora already made a space on the bed for Chanyeol to lay down. “Yoo -”

“Stay awake and you’re required to explain to me what happened after your phone call with Sehun, detail by detail or sleep for an hour? Your choice, little brother.” Yoora gives Chanyeol a cheeky grin. “I’d rather have you choose the first one so you can satisfy my inquisitions.”

“I’ll choose the latter.” Chanyeol takes Yoora’s hand before the older leaves the room. “Thank you. I appreciate everything.”

To say that Yoora is surprised would probably be an understatement. She felt how sincere that thank you was and for a moment, she may have forgotten how badly she was worried about him last night. “Rest.”

Chanyeol quickly dozes to sleep as soon as he lays down comfortably like a baby. Everything is calm and quiet until he gets inside his weird dream again, but this time, rather than a voice, Chanyeol chases after a faceless person, drifting away from him to nothingness.

And it honestly scares him.

_Sayang… dowa… sayang…._

Chanyeol hopelessly runs after hearing those words he couldn't even understand.

_Wait._ Chanyeol desperately reaches his hand to the figure who is obviously reaching out for him. _Don't go… take my hand._

Chanyeol feels the complete attachment to the figure. Something in his chest ached so badly when he isn't able to reach him because he suddenly fell into deep waters that bizarrely existed on his path. What’s weird is that his body started freezing, making it hard for him to breathe.

“Eun! No!” Chanyeol screams, his body jolting up reflexively. His shout is heard by the people outside.

Yoora, rushes by his side in a heartbeat after his scream. “Chanyeol, breathe!” The older calms him down by caressing his back as he gasps for air. His dream feels so real to the point that Chanyeol is shaking.

“I drowned.” Chanyeol stutters, his eyes shaking as he looks at Yoora. The older tries not to gasp - Chanyeol has a phobia with open waters and it must be the reason why he’s so scared. “I - the dream… I had it again…”

“It’s just a dream, Chanyeol.” Yoora coaxes him, embracing her shaking brother tightly. “It’s okay. You’re okay. Calm down.”

“Please leave me for awhile.” Chanyeol mumbles. “I - I should prepare for my wedding.”

Space. Chanyeol needs space away from people.

“Yes, yes. certainly yes.”

Yoora makes sure Chanyeol is okay before leaving. He was shaken by a dream. The older recalls the things Chanyeol shouted earlier. _Eun._

Yoora shrugs whatever Eun is because the wedding will happen in an hour or so and they have to hurry. However, _Eun_ also made Yoora interested.

To be fair, Yoora should give credit to her brother for being swift on preparing himself before going to Myeondong Cathedral. He took a shower in less than five minutes and made himself look like he had a full night of sleep. You won't even think that he had a panic attack a while ago.

He keeps on looking at his phone on the way, waiting for a message to arrive. Yoora offers to take his phone for a while because it seems like it’s clouding his mind with unnecessary thoughts that would hinder him from enjoying this most awaited day.

“If Sehun calls -”

“I will keep a look out.” Yoora assures him by holding his hand. “Nervous?”

Chanyeol shakes his head. “I have mixed emotions about everything but if there’s a dominant feeling, then I’m happy, excited?”

“You really love Yuki.”

Chanyeol nods. Of course. They’ve been with each other for a very long time. He loves him.

Yuki’s family is already around, greeting guests with their friendliest smile. As usual, Yuki’s mother takes notice of his hair, asking how come he had not cut it in the salon and all Chanyeol could do is apologize. Yoora tied his hair so nicely and comfortably but just like Yuki, his in laws really doesn't like it.

Before he gets roasted by his in laws, Mrs. Ahn comes to his rescue. She pulls him away and drags him to stand by the altar for the wedding is about to start soon. Chanyeol feels the chills - he couldn't believe this day would come and despite so many happenings yesterday, the wedding still pushes thru.

Chanyeol will live and enjoy this moment, just like what his father told him. He’s feeling antsy, hands sweating coldly and he couldn't seem to stay in place but it’s all because of anticipation. He can't wait for the huge oak doors to open up and watch Yuki walk down the aisle.

When the guests are settled on the benches and the wedding bells started ringing outside, Chanyeol eyes Yoora in the crown, giving a thumbs up to ask if he looks okay. She gives the biggest smile she could give and mouths “You look so cool.” to the younger. The encouragement made Chanyeol’s heart at ease. His attention focuses on the closed big oak doors, imagining what might be the smile Yuki’s giving once it reveals. His fiance has an eye smile, probably the prettiest he has seen yet when Chanyeol tried to recall when he last saw it, he couldn't actually remember. Chanyeol reminds himself that it’s okay. He will see it again today, effortlessly.

Chanyeol watches the ushers open the doors in sync and to his dismay, Yuki isn't waiting stand by on where he’s supposed to be. Murmurs filled the church in an instant. Chanyeol’s hands turn cold with the sight of Mrs. Ahn looking so troubled as she talks on her head piece.

The people are beginning to search for Yuki. Mrs. Ahn’s staff went out of the church following her.

No matter how much Chanyeol tries to make himself believe that everything’s fine, it doesn't help if it’s already happening right in front of you. His shaking doesn't stop and his head hurts from the waves of bad thoughts filling his head. Chanyeol sees Yoora leaving her seat with a portion of her skirt being carried in her arms so she can assess what’s really happening.

Moments passed and still, there’s no Yuki walking down the aisle but Yoora who looked like she’s trying to contain what she’s feeling inside.

Chanyeol wishes Yoora didn't look disappointed and mad. When she reaches him at the altar, the older hands him his phone with Yuki on the line. He quickly grabs the phone so worriedly. “Hey baby? Where are you? Were you stuck? Should Yoora get you? The wedding -”

_“It’s not gonna happen, Chanyeol.”_

No.

Chanyeol shakes his head, trying to counter the understanding his brain is giving him. “We can wait for you, baby. _I can wait for you.”_

“ _I don't want to marry you anymore.”_

Chanyeol hears Yuki croak on the other line, as if he’s breaking like him inside. Maybe he’s being delusional but Chanyeol thinks it’s impossible to unlove someone you’ve been with so quickly like that right?

“Yuki… don't do this… please? What’s the matter? Where are you?”

“ _Chanyeol don't make it too hard for the both of us.”_ Yuki’s tone says that he’s already decided and no one can change his mind anymore, which broke Chanyeol’s heart into millions of pieces. The archaeologist couldn't feel his knees but his mind tells him that he shouldn't let the people see him weak. _Because rather than understanding, it would start gossips._

Yoora is seething as she pitifully looks at her brother trying his best not to cry.

_“I told Mrs. Ahn that I’m cancelling the wedding. You can hate me all you want but I’m not going to come anymore. Don't wait for me.”_

The phone call ends and Chanyeol stands there, muddled, wondering why Yuki didn't gave him a reason for backing out.

“Chan -”

“Please.” Chanyeol can feel all the eyes looking at him with pity and judgement. The guests probably know by now that the wedding is off but are still waiting for him to announce it, anyways. He looks around and sees a mic near him and takes it.

Chanyeol takes a deep breath, setting aside all the embarrassment, hurt, sadness and tears he could feel his eyes would give off.

“I apologize for all the hassle and efforts that you’ve given for -” Chanyeol wipes the lone tear that fell down his cheek quickly. “- today. The wedding is cancelled. The… the reception is still open for those who wishes to eat and rest… Thank.. you…”

After his short confirmation speech, he walks out the nearest exit, not knowing where he can go to hide from everyone and let himself feel all the emotions he’s trying to suppress.

*****

Chanyeol knows it’s futile to reach out and dial Yuki’s number but he still tries nevertheless. He’s been trying to talk to him, sending a bunch of messages day and night, phoning his personal and home number yet his Yuki chose not to answer. Chanyeol has been desperate for probably a week now - he’s not aware of the date already since he hasn't actually left his room and talked to people. All he did with his phone in hand is to wait for Yuki. He refuses Yoora’s attempt to talk to him. His inbox is flooded of apologetic messages from the guests but he doesn't give a damn to anybody’s sympathy or whatever they have for him.

He should be used to getting his call rejected by now, but it still hurts so bad just like when Yuki told him his decision on cancelling their wedding.

“Yuki. I need you.” Chanyeol whispers, choking on his tears as he records a voice message because Yuki isn't picking up. He’s lucky Yuki hasn't blocked his number just yet. “Please, let’s talk. I - I want to see you… please..”

The voice message is short. It’s probably going to be the last one he’ll send for the day and will just try again tomorrow. The emotional pain he’s feeling exhausts and weighs him down. He thinks if he sleeps everything for a while, he’ll regain his energy somehow.

Yet, even sleep is impossible for him. His brain replays everything - the pitying looks, Yuki running away, even his weird dream doesn't let him find peace whenever he closes his eyes.

Chanyeol knows it’s stupid to beg for someone who doesn't love you anymore to come back but how can he let go of Yuki that easily when his heart and mind still refuses to believe that their long term relationship has ended without any explanation? In just a whiff, Yuki decided that he doesn’t love him anymore?

Is love that fickle? One time you have it in your hands, the next time it’s not?

How can the pain in his heart stop if the only person he needs is the reason of it?

All the years they built their dream of having a house of their own and kids that look a mixed of both of them when they’re still in high school is trashed but Chanyeol is more than willing to pick it up again.

He wants Yuki to come back.

“Yeol.” Chanyeol hears his knob turn, but it’s locked, refraining anyone to get in. “It’s been days, you’ve barely eaten everything I made for you… if … if you can just eat a little… I won’t bother you with anything anymore… just..” that’s a sob. Chanyeol grips on his sheets, angry for making Yoora shed a tear for him. If he can only comfort her, he would but how can he comfort other people if he can’t even do that to himself.

“I know you’re having a hard time right now… and it hurts… but don’t beat yourself up with what happened. It’s not your fault. You did everything for Yuki…”

_If I did everything, then why did he leave me?_

_If I did everything, why is it easy for him to ignore me?_

_If I did everything, why is it so easy for him to walk away from our dream?_

He doesn’t know where to begin with all these unanswered questions and it hurts so bad but Chanyeol doesn’t have any tears to cry anymore.

Chanyeol doesn’t come out of his room until late that afternoon until Yoora notifies him that she’ll just buy ingredients for the dinner she’s making. It feels different as soon as he steps out of his room and it’s all because every part of his apartment is squeaky clean and kept. Yoora probably kept herself busy in her stay and it has become her habit to clean his place.

Because he hasn't seen much of the sun and barely eaten anything, Chanyeol can feel how weak his body is. He couldn’t stand properly on his feet that he has to grab onto something for support.

He notices the luggage inside the guest room and thought Yoora’s probably decided to stay in his apartment for a while. Chanyeol feels thankful that after all the ignoring he did to her, she’s still hanging around. Patiently trying to help him like she always does.

He feels bad that he couldn’t do much – that he couldn’t function well because of what had happened. It was a huge blow to him.

Reaching his kitchen, Chanyeol is reminded of the silly moments he and Yuki had before. Every corner reminds him of the latter and it’s inevitable – they used to be inseparable, full of love.

The whys are still in his head and he will never get it answered if he’s going to lock himself in his room and wait for Yuki to talk to him. It’s a big driving force for him to come up with the decision to go out to clean himself up.

He has to go to Yuki’s place. There’s a big possibility that he’ll beg and make a fool out of himself once he’s there but he could go to any lengths just to have his first love back.

Maybe he’s just letting himself hurt again but still, an explanation will do for him because the more time Chanyeol spends confused of how did the fall out happen, the more reason for his heart to break even more.

Chanyeol didn’t spend much time in the bathroom. The way he looked is unflattering – for a week, he managed to look like a homeless guy. His eyes are dark rimmed, he lost a few kilograms of his weight and his face is covered with hair. Chanyeol can’t stand the way he looked but he thought if Yuki sees him living miserably, then maybe… just maybe… he might have a change of heart.

Before leaving, Chanyeol left a note on the fridge for Yoora. It was a lie that he went out to breathe a little fresh air knowing that his sister would definitely worry about him if he told the truth. As soon as he sets out of his apartment, Chanyeol feels the immense odd feeling inside him as if he suddenly doesn’t belong. He shrugs the thought because it’s probably what he should do. He can’t risk being out of focus while he uses his motorbike on a snowy road.

In no time, Chanyeol reaches Yuki’s parents’ house. He was about to go directly to Yuki’s apartment but then he remembered that his ex-fiancé already moved out prior to their wedding. Even though he’s not sure, Chanyeol wanted to try at least.

He stands in front of the gate and took a good time before he actually rings the doorbell. He keeps on doubting if what he’s doing is okay or it would just make Yuki distance himself away from him.

But then, he already rang the bell and he could hear someone coming to get it.

His heart stopped when he sees Yuki’s mother again. Obviously, she’s not pleased to see him but that’s understandable. His eyes darted on the black car park inside – it was Yuki’s.

“Yuki’s not here, Chanyeol. Come again… next time –“ Mrs. Na is quick to shun Chanyeol away by closing their gates. He uses his arm to stop the gates from being completely shut in panic. It hurts but Chanyeol knows if he won’t be able to talk to Yuki, the hurt will further make him miserable.

“Auntie.” That enough speaks Chanyeol’s begging. “I know Yuki’s there.”

“It’s not a good time, Chanyeol.” The woman answers, but she didn’t close the gate after how she accidentally inflicted pain on him. “Please leave for now. Yuki’s having a hard time too.”

“I just want to talk Auntie – it’s been days. I’m –“ Chanyeol bites down his words. _I’m having a hard time too._ He wants to let them know that Yuki’s not the only person having a hard time.

He – _the person who was abandoned on his wedding day_ – is lost. He doesn’t want to compare his hurt but when he thinks about it, isn’t he the one who’s majorly hurt with what Yuki did?

“Yuki can’t talk to you right now. What’s so hard to understand about it? Leave, Chanyeol. Or else I’ll call security.”

“Auntie. Don’t do this to me -” Chanyeol tries his best to get inside by force without hurting the old woman. His intrusion was cut off when he sees Yuki come out of their house and he looks completely alright. No matter how Chanyeol wanted to understand that looks can be deceiving, knowing him like the back of his hand gives away the truth.

If Yuki’s having a hard time, it will show. For Chanyeol, it doesn’t feel like he’s actually feeling the same as him. Not an ounce similar to his pain.

He used to look at Yuki with so much love but when their eyes met, it’s all bitterness and sadness.

“Mom. I’ll handle this.” The shorter mumbles, rubbing his arm. Chanyeol knows that mannerism. He’s uncomfortable.

“But Yu –“ Mrs. Na sounds like she doesn’t know Chanyeol all of a sudden, as if he’s going to hurt Yuki if she leaves.

“It’s okay, mom. Please go inside. I’ll follow quickly.”

Chanyeol can see how Mrs. Na eyes Yuki worriedly and it hurt him to be treated like a stranger. They’ve known him since he’s a kid and never did he have any intention of hurting Yuki yet he swallows it all. 

When Mrs. Na decides to get inside, awkwardness fills the distance between them quickly. Chanyeol doesn't know what to say and the more silence they share, the heavier it is for both. 

  


“What do you want to hear from me, Chanyeol? ” Yuki spat coldly and Chanyeol can't believe Yuki has this side on him. “Let’s not waste both of our time anymore.” 

  


“Is seeing me a waste of time now?”

“Let’s get this over with quickly, Chanyeol.”

  


Chanyeol’s balls his fists in frustration. How can Yuki get over everything so quickly? Does he even matter to him?

  


“Why?” It was so hard to speak for Chanyeol, like there’s a big lump of rock stuck in his throat as he exchanges gazes with his ex. It was frustrating, he doesn't know what to say. 

  


“Why I ran away?” Yuki gives him a standoffish look, completing a question Chanyeol wanted to be answered. “I don't love you anymore.”

  


It feels like he’s being slapped in the face but Chanyeol stays, not to give Yuki a chance to see how his words wreck him so painfully.

  


“I’ve been feeling this for months now but I wasn't so sure. I thought, maybe it’s because we lacked time together because honestly, I couldn't bring myself to believe that I’ll wake up one morning with the thought that I don't feel the love for you anymore. You’re my best friend. My first love. The only man I loved so much and it scared me. I’m scared to hurt you.”  


  


Yuki’s eyes are brimming with tears and Chanyeol feels awful to actually see him desperate like that. All their years of being together, Chanyeol wanted nothing but to make Yuki happy and as much as he wants to stop the talk and just embrace the latter tightly, he knows it’s not necessary. The latter won't be comforted by him.

  


“I tried to get myself together, thinking that I’m just having wedding scares but every passing day… the thought of having a family with you dreads me. I’m not happy. It’s not like when we’re so young and our love is new that imagining twelve kids is fun. I - find it hard to even think… of a wedding vow. Then it hits me…”

  


“Why … didn't you tell me earlier… that we’re falling apart...” 

“I wanted to but you were couped up with your study.” Yuki reasons, his voice shaking because of how he’s trying to hold back his tears. “You didn't have the time to sit down with me and talk about things? When we’re together, what do we do aside from fighting and fucking each other? Chanyeol, that was our cycle for the past months that I’ve been feeling lost that even if you’re beside me, I don't feel you’re there.”

  


Chanyeol questions if it’s his fault that they drifted. 

  


“I’m sorry if I embarrassed and let you handle all the -”

  


“No. I never cared about other people’s opinion about me -” Chanyeol snaps and it’s obvious that Yuki was taken aback with the sudden raise of voice. “I could’ve done something to fix the rift we are having.”

  


“I don't think it can be fixed anyways.”

  


“Why are you so quick to give up on me?” he asks again, putting Yuki into uncomfortableness. “Why are you so quick to give up on the years we spent together? I was more than willing to do anything and give up everything for you, just to make you happy. I quit being part of AXIS because I don't want to upset you. How can you say it can't be fixed anyways? Why are you so sure?”

  


“Because when I ran away, I never felt so free.” Yuki confesses with a straight face and Chanyeol feels like the latter poured a bucket of water to give him a wake up call. “Chanyeol... It’s so heavy.” Yuki clutches a hand on his chest, his voice so close on breaking down to tears. “I don't want to force myself to hold on everyday, trying to make myself believe that I still love you because I don't. I know it’s a waste to let go of our relationship - we’ve been together for years. The trust… and friendship we built is surprising.. and someone else might never be able to give the care and support for me in everything like you do but... It’s not enough to make me stay.” 

Yuki lifted his gaze towards Chanyeol and there’s no denying how sure he is with every word he said. There’s no doubt. “One day, when all the pain is gone, you’ll thank me for freeing the both of us with the commitment that will never work anymore. I don't want unnecessary hardships for the both of us.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Chanyeol didn't stay long after realizing that no matter how much he would beg like what he initially planned, there’s no point already since Yuki is dead sure about his decision of ending their relationship. 

  


By this time, Chanyeol feels that he is accustomed to the pain he’s feeling in his chest and there’s no other way to mend it but to move forward. To where? He’s not really sure and thinking about it makes his head hurt so bad yet he’s hopeful he won't be stuck in the hellhole he’s currently in for a long time. 

If Yuki can do it, then maybe he can just forget everything easily. 

  
  
  
  


With no plans for the rest of the night, Chanyeol decides to spend it drinking and eating at the nearby food tent he happened to pass by on his way home for a starter. Soju and grilled meat is a go to for most people suffering from a heartbreak according to Yoora before.

  


Chanyeol occupies a table away from people and the coal burning on the center table actually warmed him up. For the first time, Chanyeol slightly felt nice because the old woman who owns the place gave him extra side dishes he can dig in while he waits for his meat to be cooked. “Stuff yourself up, okay.” she says nicely to which Chanyeol returns a courteous nod.

  


He thought the old woman probably felt that he’s having a very bad night and it reminds him of how his mom is when she’s still alive. Mothers’ instincts scare Chanyeol but at the same time, it makes him fuzzy inside. 

  


Chanyeol loses count of the bottles he already finished. He’s so drowned with everything Yuki told him and he wishes he gets numb as series of bottles came to his table. However, the numbness of the pain filling his heart didn't happen much to his desperation. The alcohol just made Chanyeol more vulnerable to his feelings. It was so heavy that he started tearing up, blaming the smoke coming into his eyes that results to his crying. 

Of course, moving on will never be easy and Chanyeol was kidding himself if he actually believed that he can be like Yuki who already fell out of love months ago. 

Chanyeol then goes blaming himself for lacking the hint that they are drifting. He indulged himself with work, and failed to see that Yuki’s having internal troubles like that. 

It sucks that his mind can’t process every thought all at once like how he usually does in his job. Funny how love and feelings can actually make a person dumb. He continues to order additional bottles to his table. He felt the dire need to actually get drunk and forget, even for just one night. Chanyeol looks pitiful, pouring his own drink and he goes on like that for hours and hours until he’s the only person remaining in the tent.

  


“ _Ahjuuummaa_ ~” he slurs, sounding so funny and cute. He almost falls off his seat if the kind owner didn't rush to his side “Two bottles please.”

  


“Aigoo.” The old woman groans while assisting him on having a stable position. “No more. You’ve been drinking too much… enough.”

“I’ll pay, _ahjuumaaa_.” Chanyeol whines, insisting. “Should I act cute for you to give me more? Ah.. Have you seen Jesus act cute? Wanna see?”

  
  


Chanyeol manages to have a deal with the owner that after the last two bottles he ordered, he’ll leave the place. The owner might be moved with his Jesus aegyo or maybe she understood what he needed without even saying his situation. No matter what reason is, Chanyeol is beyond grateful he could enjoy two more bottles and a platter of meat on the house. 

  
  


After finishing his drinks, Chanyeol is able to settle his bill even if he could barely stand on his feet without actually having someone to assist him. The owner worries over his condition and offers to hail a cab for him but Chanyeol refuses, insisting that he can actually reach home on his own. This is the thing with Chanyeol being drunk - he’s twice as stubborn. He doesn't like accepting help from the people around him. 

  


The cold air beginning to embrace his whole body and the incessant vibrations of his phone kept inside his pocket practically made him aware of his surroundings and what he should actually accomplish. Though he can't stand straight, he realizes that he has to go home now and shut everything with a long sleep. The vibrations of his phone is most probably from Yoora, worrying over him at his apartment.

He manages to send her a message. _Going home in a bit._ That’s it. He’s too drunk to make the message longer. 

  


Chanyeol decides to freshen up a bit by having a walk to any nearby convenience store and buy a can of warm tea but he’s not familiar with the place. He doesn't have any destination in mind and his feet acts it. The silence of the neighbourhood drowns him again with all the reason why he spent the night drinking. 

  


He laughs at himself for crying out in the sidewalk, walking uncoordinatedly like a zombie. It was something he never thought of doing but it’s just frustrating that the pain lingers inside him. No matter how many times he wiped his tears and try to act tough, he’s still hurt. No matter how many alcohol he drank, Yuki’s still clouding his mind and heart and he can't be alright. Chanyeol had his life all planned and with the sudden change and lost of the person he cherish more than himself, he just feels useless and terribly lost. 

  


He isn't aware aware that he has been walking for awhile now until a familiar bakeshop comes into his view. Chanyeol looks around and recognized that his feet led him near the manor and the bakeshop just across him is Jongdae’s.

Weird to see the shop still open while most of the surrounding stores nearby stopped operating already. 

  


Chanyeol’s about to continue his walk and give the manor a visit when his eyes darted on a familiar figure seated by the windows of Jongdae’s bakeshop. At first, he thought his intoxication is making him see things weirdly. He harshly rubs his eyes to have a clearer look. Second and third look happens and he’s still seeing it.

  


Chanyeol can feel his heart throb - all because he feels mad that his eyes aren't fooling him. 

  


There’s no mistaking that the familiar figure seated by the glass windows of Jongdae’s bakeshop is someone he knows.

  


Long grey hair braided nicely. Small pale face. Blue sweater bigger than his body.

  
  


It’s Ippeuni, very much alive and calm unlike the way Sehun described him. 

  


And maybe his thoughts and emotions are piled up that looking at Ippeuni awake, eating cookies leisurely irks him. 

  


It’s weird that the pent up frustration and hurt makes him succumb to a feeling Chanyeol himself is scared of but he just doesn't care anymore.

  


Hate. 

That’s what he’s feeling. If only he’s sober he could have assessed everything first but all his mind could process is the fact that Yuki changed after Ippeuni came in the picture.

  


_He_ changed after Ippeuni came in the picture. 

  


If Ippeuni wasn't handed to AXIS, then maybe… Chanyeol’s enjoying his honeymoon already. 

If he hadn't given the frozen boy attention and time then maybe, Yuki wouldn’t have drifted away from him. 

  


Chanyeol never felt so mad his entire life. He didn't give it a second thought, busting inside the shop with a big scowl on his face, his sight is blurry with the tears he had shed a while ago.

  


_If you haven't been found then maybe everything is normal in my life._

  


Chanyeol grabs Ippeuni’s frail wrist the moment he reaches his table. It leads the mug of seemingly hot chocolate the shorter boy is about to drink spill on his body, scalding his skin beneath his clothes. 

  


It was evident on the latter’s face that the grip Chanyeol’s giving his wrist and the scald pained him, yet the taller doesn't release Ippeuni from his hold.

  


The archaeologist pulls the boy to stand up effortlessly like he’s just holding a weightless thing. Amidst his furiousness, a sinister thought came unbidden in his mind that Ippeuni is so lovely to trample and hurt. 

  


Chanyeol momentarily freezes on his place with the sudden hostility he thought of and pinned it all instead on the plate near him with a cake in it that looks untouched. With his free hand, Chanyeol smashes it on the ground, shattering it to pieces. 

Ippeuni could only open his mouth, taken aback from everything that’s happening as he stares at the ruined cake.

  
  


When the boy looks at Chanyeol, he sees how terrified and confused the shorter looks at him gazed at him. Ippeuni starts shaking when realization hits him that someone’s aggressively disturbing his peace. He immediately and desperately tries to release himself from his attacker.

  
  


Almost. 

Ippeuni almost frees himself but his determination is nothing compared to Chanyeol’s strength and agility to hold him back again. “You’ve taken everything from me.” the taller clenches his teeth, anger seeping out of every word he utters. Ippeuni doesn't seem to understand and continues to wiggle out his strong restraints. “You were the reason why all of these happened to me!” 

  


The shorter boy looks at him, begging with tears in the eyes Chanyeol used to adore. For a moment, Chanyeol remembered those bicolored eyes he would always imagine filled with curiosity and unadulterated innocence. They still glisten just like how he imagined him when he’s still in the pod - the only difference now is that Ippeuni’s eyes glisten because of the tears caused by fear. “Why must I meet you? Why of all facilities, why be given to AXIS!” Chanyeol shouts, shaking Ippeuni’s whole body.

  
  


The commotion sends Jongdae running out of the kitchen to where they are, panic and worry plastered on his face. He grabs Chanyeol by the arm but the taller refused to look at him. “What are you doing, Chanyeol-ssi? Stop! You’re hurting him!”

  


“He’s the reason why my life is a mess right now!” Chanyeol insists, terrifying Ippeuni even more. “You should’ve stay frozen and never been discovered you freak!”

  


Jongdae was pushed harshly to one side, knocking over a centerpiece in the table where his body fell. He can see how raging Chanyeol is even from behind and Ippeuni looks at him as if he’s asking for help.

  


The boy’s eyes are quivering, helplessly trying to push Chanyeol away. Even though Jongdae feels hurt, he tries his best to stand between them to separate the two once more. He isn't aware of Sehun’s arrival and get **s surprised to see the younger bolt pass him to help.**

  


“Hyung let go!” Sehun hugs Chanyeol from behind, attempting to pull him away from Ippeuni. “He’s getting hurt, _hyung_. Enough!”

“This freak -” Chanyeol was muffled because of fighting back Sehun’s pull. The younger noticed his soju induced breath. “Let go of me.”

“No! Let go of Ippeuni! You’re drunk! You don't know what you’re doing!”

  


“I know what I want to do Sehun! I’ll bring him back to where he was found! Maybe in that way, Yuki will come back to me.” 

  


“What the hell?” What Sehun heard from Chanyeol is enough to make him mad and lose control of his emotions. He harshly pulls Chanyeol away, leading the older to accidentally let go of Ippeuni. The frail looking boy falls to the floor with debris, getting himself injured on his arms and feet. When Chanyeol was being pulled away by Sehun, Ippeuni crawls his way under the table to hide. It was a pitiful sight that only Jongdae could see because Sehun and Chanyeol struggles with each other.

“Hyung, stop!” Sehun was using his body as a shield as Chanyeol insistently tries to reach for Ippeuni again. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Everything is wrong because of that freak! He shouldn't have been discovered -” Chanyeol shouts, making Sehun scowl. He lifts his fist and gave the older a harsh punch, enough to send him knocking a few chairs as he falls down on the floor. 

“Pull yourself together, Chanyeol hyung!” Sehun shouts, grabbing the older in his collar to stand up. He could feel the fist he used to hit the older aching so badly - he’s a nerd, he knows nothing about brawl fights and hurting someone is something he’d never do. “Hyung, I understand that you’re hurting right now but what you’re feeling right now doesn't give you a pass to hurt innocent people. Ippeuni has nothing to do with what happened to you and Yuki.”

“You don't understand anything, Sehun.” Chanyeol scoffs, his eyes tearing up. He could see Ippeuni peeking under the table and felt his own guilt tripping him yet he can't stop what he’s feeling. “I lost everything! I lost Yuki because of him! Because he came into my life! When was the last time you went out with friends, Sehun-ah? When was the last time you did something out of AXIS?”

The younger’s eyebrows scrunches. 

And Chanyeol answered for him. “You don't remember right?” he snorts. “because just like me - we were chained to that freak!”

Sehun stops himself from beating Chanyeol again. His uninjured fist up in the air just in case the older does something reckless that can scare Ippeuni again. He can’t understand where his anger is coming from and he definitely doesn’t like to hear him say mean things to the innocent boy. “Why… why are you blaming Ippeuni, hyung?”

  


Chanyeol is about to answer when a splash of cold water hits both of them. Sehun looks at his side with wide eyes and frowns confusedly at Jongdae. 

_When did he get the bucket of water?_

_What did he do to be treated that way? the air is cold enough to freeze him to bones. Why would Jongdae do that to them?_

Jongdae ignores him and proceeds to grab Chanyeol by the arm and effortlessly drags the taller man out of the shop. Sehun doesn't know whether he should go to Ippeuni and calm the boy down from his evident shaking or he should follow the two.

“Ippeuni. Hello. It’s Sehun.” he crouches down, slowly walking closer to Ippeuni. The boy quickly cowers, making Sehun stop from moving. For the past week, he learned that Ippeuni doesn't like it when people casually approach him. It seems like to the boy, casual approach poses danger to him. 

As expected for someone who’s completely confused to everything around him. Ippeuni exhibits feral characteristics. Sehun had to tone his excitement down to get close with the very much alive boy. 

Sehun waits for Ippeuni to look at him again and when the boy peeks, he welcomes him with a small smile. “It’s Sehun.. come here…” the archaeologist inserts his hand inside his pants pocket and pulls out a plastic of sour tape candy. “Here… I brought you something nice.

Call him a scam but Sehun’s only way to get close to a tamed Ippeuni is food - candies specifically. Thanks to his pain-in-the ass niece whom he babysitted back then is where he got the idea. 

The sound of the plastic being crumpled in Sehun’s hands piques the interest of the boy. He carefully lifts his head and stared back at Sehun who’s trying to contain himself. 

_Ippeuni looking at him without fear is a progress._

He extends his hand and waits for Ippeuni to reach out to him. He can see the boy lifting a hand but much to Sehun’s dismay, Jongdae arrives and ruins his supposed to be closest encounter with Ippeuni. 

Jongdae pulls him by the collar of his shirt and throws him out of the shop just like what the patissier did to Chanyeol awhile ago. 

  


“If you want to bust each other’s faces then do it somewhere else.” Jongdae yells, closing his glass door at Sehun’s face. 

“Wait Jongdae-ssi!” Sehun tries to open the door, confusion plastered on his face. “What did I do -”

“Go home.” 

“But -”

“Can't you see Ippeuni is terrified with Chanyeol?” the patissier mumbles as he looks at where Ippeuni must be hiding. “You told me Chanyeol will help you with taking care of Ippeuni - you told me that I don't have to worry because Ippeuni will be in good hands in AXIS but… but _Chanyeol_ tried to hurt him. I don't know what’s the deal but please… leave for now.” Sehun takes a step back and realizes the frown on Jongdae’s face is pure worry. “I thought Chanyeol… will be happy to see him based on your stories... ”

The assistant archaeologist sighs. “ _I thought so too.”_

“Chanyeol is drunk. Please assist him first.”

“And Ippeuni?”

“I’ll calm him down.”

Sehun bits his lower lip - he really didn't want to leave but when he looks around the area, Chanyeol is already out of sight and that’s bothering. “You’ll text me if you need anything right? If Ippeuni -”

“If anything happens with Ippeuni, I’ll call you in a heartbeat. For now, go and find Chanyeol.” 

When Jongdae pulls down the blinds, Sehun knows it’s time for him to leave and find the older just like how the patissier told him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahh. sorry for the delay! i was kind of busy the past days! anyway! thank you again to the lovely comments. i dont know how to respond but thank you. i really appreciate it! to my beta! Ate M! You are always the best thank you for giving me feedbacks of for stomaching the slow burn! and Yuki! Most esp yuki!! thank you to aina too for being my translator. some of the language shown here is bahasa so you can google it. :)


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